Zhong guo (The China Experience)

Humbleness

2009-03-05T06:16:00.001-08:00

It was hard to begin writing before, because it has been such a long time since I last wrote anything. Where to start, what to say... there is so much to express in words about life and my recent experiences. At the same time, I don't want to just dump everything on paper, or worse, come off in any way that's pretentious.

At first, I wanted to title this blog entry as "Back Once Again," as I had the song by Fat Boy Slim come to mind (my friend Charlie did a really cool video edit using this song, haha). Then, I continued by writing about time, how the past and the future don't exist -- that everything is now. I wanted to link it to how I feel that I am in the same place again -- Tianjin, China. Next, I wanted to say that, even though I am here once again (Tianjin, China), things have changed.

Well, that was a lot easier to say, looking back in hindsight and admitting that I have no intention of writing anything so pretentious, something full of fluff and extra words to fill up a sheet of paper; you know, the kind of stuff you write in college to meet the 4-5 page requirement for your assignment.

I've also thought off and on about my friend, Bruno. It might be easier to write about someone else at the moment, but then again, I don't want to embarass that person by making him or her the center of attention. I'll just say that Bruno has influenced my thoughts about blogging. He's right in that one should conscientiously be humble when writing; that one should not try to come off as so glorifying of his or her experiences. And, well, I feel that maybe I made that mistake before -- that I felt so glorified in my experiences as a traveler in China. But, the reality is, I am like many people who are searching for more in life.

So many planes criss-cross the world everyday, taking different people to different parts of the world. What I accomplished last year in China is no greater or less than what other people have done in their lives as well; and are doing now as I am writing this blog. For this reason and more, I apologize for coming off in any way arrogant or pretentious.

One of my goals for this year, and for the rest of my life, is to be a much humbler person. I never want to think of myself as being better than others... nor do I want to treat others as lesser than me.

China has been a very good challenge and test for me to break down any arrogance or high-minded thinking I have previously held, to develop modesty and be more humble in thought. Each and every day, I am met with someone who looks to be of lower socioeconomic status than me; whether it be their clothing, or the way they comb their hair; or how they behave. Overall, it's very easy to spot who's got money and who's got nothing.

A lot of people here, unfortunately, are part of the "who's got nothing" and it's very apparent, if only on the outside. As I've said before, most people here either walk or commute by bus or bike. If you're in a city like Tianjin, you won't see people with name brand clothing; and if you do, it's most likely a fake. You'll notice that a lot of people here have aged very badly; faces weathered and hands worn out; darkened skin and grey hair. Basically, life is and has been rough in China (at least for those who aren't wealthy businessmen living in fast developing cities like Shanghai or Beijing).

I don't want to draw out this idea anymore, but I'll simply say that I think twice when I see these people who, in my opinion, dress poorly, or act crudely (like spitting on the ground). Initially, and before, I will want to look down upon these people; maybe think of them in a "barbaric" sense (or, as some Chinese people joke, as the poor farmers of the countryside). But I remind myself that these people grow our food; they clean our streets and restaurants; they cook our food; they build our apartments and roads; they build amazing cities and highways. For the most part, they give people like me, and those who are fortunate, a more comfortable and privileged life.

Valdo once told me the same for my own country -- that Hispanics and black people (along with other "minorities") are the ones responsible for the development of the U.S.; for the wonderful parks, zoos, swimming pools and neighborhoods; for the convenience of living, such as driving on streets and living in houses/apartments.

Well, that's one point that I would like to make in my attempts to be humbler; to remind myself that I'm not so sexy and great (at all); that I should be more thankful for others who have created the human world (of cities and skyscrapers) around me.

For now on, I want to devote each blog entry to some aspect of China, or to anything really... so long as I am not the center of attention. I think, before, this blog was focused on me and my rantings; rantings about how I saw China and the way I think about politics and stuff (immature thoughts and viewpoints, I feel).

I used to also think this would be my way of keeping in touch with people, but 1.) we have been blessed with email and skype, so I will keep in touch with you all that way 2.) I don't believe in somebody writing about themselves -- it's too self-glorifying (unless you are a very accomplished person, like Benjamin Franklin). I will also try to be more concise and less drawn out -- I just want to introduce something that is meaningful and interesting to me.

Well, for those who have read this blog and have been so kind and patient as to give me your attention -- I don't want to waste it on myself any further...

China -- Overall Impression

2008-06-01T03:22:00.000-07:00

So it looks like we are already in our last week of May, just under two months before I return to the U.S. Although my last entry might give the impression that I have disliked China, my true feelings are quite the contrary. It has been a very complicated journey, one filled with excitement and frustration. The frustration comes from the fact that I may never truly understand Chinese people, because of our differing backgrounds in both history and culture. I think Chinese people are some of the most wonderful people in the world; their love and care for one another is, in many ways, unmatched; their understanding of health and life is grounded by a long history that could never be understood by current Western standards.

Even though it’s easy to denounce their methods and practices as “outdated”, or worse, “backward”, the exact opposite is true; Chinese people, on average, live a much healthier lifestyle than most Americans. Sure, their standard of living may not be as enjoyable, but China’s history is much more complex and involved than America’s. Take into account Western imperialism and the destruction that Europe and the U.S. caused for China’s society in the 20^th century. Even before that time, try to understand the magnitude of China and its overall geography; for hundreds of years, China constantly faced invasion by the Mongols and other outside groups, vying for China’s power and wealth. It’s much easier when you’re surrounded by ocean, which has given the U.S. great advantage over the years.

Added to that effect is China’s population, which raises many challenges and problems. When you are dealing with 1.33 billion people, things begin to slow down, efficiency is lost, and creating a favorable situation for all is close to impossible. I constantly wrestle with this phenomenon – is it China’s fault for its swelling population? Many have said that during the beginning years of the P.R.C., Mao Ze Dong encouraged all families to have plenty of children; he said that more numbers is equivalent to greater power. Of course, we now know that this isn’t the case. For this reason, China’s population boomed during the 20^th century. But, you have to remember Mao Ze Dong’s background and where he came from. He wasn’t a college-educated politician like Barack Obama; nor was he a wealthy family member of the Kennedys. No, he was simply a farmer from China’s countryside who had great ambitions. As a result, many people could relate to him and, for this reason, his power and fame soared.

However, also for this reason, many of the decisions he made as China’s leader are greatly questionable. Interestingly, most of China’s younger generation recognize this and realize that, although Mao should be credited for helping China’s reunification, he should also be blamed for hindering/preventing China’s development in the world. It wasn’t until the early 1980s, under Deng Xiao Ping, that China was once again opened to the world for trade and development. Since this time, China has greatly tried to catch up with the rest of the world, but under a Communist regime. There are, of course, advantages and disadvantages to this process.

I believe that Communism requires a greater level of control over people’s thinking, because for Communism to work, people must forfeit their power and freedom as individuals; after all, it is more about the group than the individual. Moreover, if the Communist system begins to falter, it is best that the people not recognize (or, at the very least, ponder) this flaw in the system; otherwise they may want to take control into their own hands and produce change. It’s like first giving trust to a friend, but once the friend makes a mistake, you will think twice about trusting this friend again; you might want to even take action into your own hands. With regard to government, it is understood in the West that the government is meant to serve the people, not the other way around. That, should the government begin to make mistakes, it is the freedom and liberty of the people to make necessary changes. I believe most Chinese people would feel the same way about this idea…

However, many Chinese people accept the notion that, for quicker and faster development, Chinese people should be in unison, forego their opinions and beliefs, and allow the government to direct China’s developmental process on its own terms. The “Economist” even credited China’s Communist government for China’s rapid economic development. For example, in our system of government, we have so many congressmen and lawmakers whose opinions are often so conflicting that it is very difficult to pass new legislation. This, of course, is mainly driven by the congressmens’ constituency – people like you and me who have the power to vote a person into office. It is often a game of political balance, whereby the politician has to please both the voters and the lobbyists (aka big business).

So, China has inherited a host of problems – Western imperialism, poor developmental and population mismanagement, political suppression via freedom and education – which China is now trying to overcome. In the face of this, China is making strides in becoming one of the world’s superpowers, and for this, I give China a lot of respect.

What’s more, I know that change can often be slow and arduous, and so I, as well as the rest of the world, should be patient; not only for China, but also for many Western practices to be changed. However, in matters of human rights, violence, freedom and peace, patient will and should wear thin quickly…

Being American in China

2008-05-07T00:39:00.000-07:00

I have been meaning to add more thoughts to this blog as new ideas arise; interesting topics are discussed and revealed to me. I have about 20 minutes before my next class, so I think it's a good time to jot down some aspects of Chinese society which I have contemplated and learned from others.

When I find moments of reflection, I often like to analyze my place in Chinese society and my overall experience as a teacher in this country. Coming back for the second semester has really been quite different from my first semester of teaching in China. Before, everything seemed so new and exciting; I was like a child in an amusement park -- all the rides seemed very big and grand. But, now China, and moreso Tianjin, has become my "home."

In this way, I no longer see myself as an "outsider," but just another resident among the local people. As a result, it's harder for me to separate my cultural tendencies from theirs -- my "sensitivity" towards Chinese culture has been somewhat... dulled. I might have mentioned this in a previous blog, but this kind of transition into another society is often good and bad. It allows me to truly experience China as a local; I take public transportation everyday; I come face-to-face with a lot of China's frustrating moments.

However, I too often approach these Chinese situations as an American. I expect a speedy, efficient service (as any other American), but then I am met with some of China's drawbacks in their overall organization and management; my patience wears thi and I begin to break down. I suppose it is because I can readily see the flaws; or, it could simply be that I haven't been exposed to it for so long that I still allow it to "bother" me. In other words, I feel that most Chinese people do recognize problems within their country, but they have lived with it for so long, that it almost becomes "background noise" for them; like a thorn in your side that you can't pick out.

For example, one thing that really bugs me is the phrase "mei you." The literal translation of this phrase is "doesn't exist," and it can be used in almost any circumstance when you want to express something that is no longer available; something that hasn't happened. Anyway, many Chinese service workers seemed to be programmed like robots to execute these two syllables -- "mei you." They will say it so quickly that you don't even have a chance to ask, "what do you mean, 'mei you'?" It is almost as if this phrase is the answer to everything. Sometimes, it's blatantly obvious that they have chosen not to help you, because they will say it too fast for a moment's thought.

So, essentially, when they say "mei you," you are expected to understand this, not ask any questions and simply move on with your life. I really don't want to dwell anymore than I have to on this phrase, but it does highlight a very common trait among most Chinese people. It's this... solemn acceptance of "failure"; that, along with "mei you," you should just accept the way things are and not question your "hardships."

One of the other foreign teachers defined this as "Chinese contentment"; that most Chinese people lack any real ambition to change the way things are in their society; they are apathetic towards such things as pollution, corruption, or anything else that would normally irritate an American. I feel that most Americans rarely take "no" for an answer; we are usually very head-strong about our opinions and desires that simply saying "mei you" (which is essentially a negative reponse like "no") will not deter our ambition/drive.

Of course, by drawing up this quick contrast between "American" and "Chinese," I am obviously one-sided in this affair; I portray Americans as "strong" and "determined" people, whereas Chinese people are "weak" and "subservient." This, naturally, isn't a fair summary -- I should probably acknowledge the system of government, as well as the history and culture of both countries. That, in China, people have less of a "voice" when it comes to policy-making and -enforcement.

For example, almost everyone I know in Tianjin recognizes the city as a very dirty and almost uninhabitable place. Lily said she had read somewhere that Tianjin could very well be the 4th most polluted city in the world; yeah, world. One then has to ask, if the city is so dirty; if people dislike the environmental degradation; if people would like to have clear blue skies, then why don't they change their actions and environmental standards? Why not cut back on the pollution they are creating?

If you ask a Chinese person, they will almost automatically blame it on China's "development"; that, just like America, when America was developing, China too will have to undergo a period of environmental disregard in favor of "development." In my opinion, I think this is a very weak argument -- it's bullshit. In my view, I see this in 2 ways -- well, actually I see it in 1 way. I believe most people are led to believe such environmental degradation is inevitable and unavoidable for the sake of China's prosperity. But, I feel the government and many of China's corporations (yes, just like America) are the drive behind China's environmental disregard. To cut the costs and gain more profit, many Chinese companies and industries prefer the old methods (the use of nonrenewable resources such as coal and oil) over newer developmental techniques. And, in the process, the people here are, again, led to think that for the sake of their "motherland," they should accept the smoggy sky and contaminated water. Sure, America created a lot of environmental decay when it was "developing," but that was something like 200 years ago! Think about all the technology that is available today, such as solar power and microprocessors... I know, expensive, but there has to be less sophisticated methods for striking a balance between development and environmental conscientiousness.

On the other hand, often times, when I'm walking in a public place, I'll see a mother have her kid squat and either piss or take a dump on the sidewalk. Or, I'll see a Chinese person chuck their trash on the ground as if the trash will magically disappear into thin air. I confronted my friend Lu Kai about this and he said most Chinese people do this because it is more convenient and comfortable for them; they don't need to hold onto their trash for a moment longer until they find a trash bin...

So, in regard to a few things that I have come to really despise in China -- "mei you," apathy and environmental disregard -- I feel Chinese habits and a history of limited freedom in political/public affairs has led to these shortcomings in China.

It seems that these things never bothered me so much before (fall 2007), but now that I am becoming more of a "Chinese citizen" by living and working in this country, certain issues begin to arise and creep up above from the surface; these issues have also become a part of my daily life...

Moreover, I know that there might very well be some critical explanations for some of China's problems; and I will admit this is simply a rough sketch of my experiences (not to mention, a biased view towards Americans). But being an American in China, I can't help but think China has space for change and better development... that just as an American will not take "no" for an answer; or that an American would probably stand up for their beliefs, Chinese people will also one day put these behaviors into everyday practice and realize true development and progress...

From Ancient Times, Taiwan Is A Part of China

2008-04-19T03:50:00.000-07:00

Today at school was an interesting experience for me. This term, I have made it mandatory that each group from my 7 classes see me at least one time for about 10-15 minutes. Though this seemed like a reasonable idea at first, it has proven to be mixed success. Now, I hardly have any free time when I go to Pearl River College, because when I’m not eating or teaching my classes, I am meeting with students.

However, today I began what has turned out to be an interesting dialogue with one group of students. Yesterday, I saw on television that China is not “happy” with Taiwan’s recent purchase of fighter jets from the U.S. So, I wanted to understand my students’ reaction to this issue – the issue of Taiwan’s relationship with both the U.S. and China. Of course, they were inclined to believe that Taiwan is and has always been a part of China; yes, the same situation with Tibet.

Yet, these students were still interested to hear what I had to say. I told them what I feel most Westerners believe – that Taiwan really isn’t part of China. If only I could have had a camera ready to record their reactions to this viewpoint… “shock” as they later described to me in a letter they wrote me.

So, the second half of this “debate” proved to be the most interesting. As it turned out, some of the students with whom I met had class with me later the same day. When it was time to call it a day and end class, these students approached me rather quickly and suspiciously. I wasn’t quite sure what they wanted to say or do, but before I could even speak a word, they handed to me what seemed like a college essay for some exam… I must admit, I was equally “shocked” by their response to mine.

The letter goes like this (verbatim):

“Dear Michael,

We are writing this letter just want to tell you a serious thing… You said Taiwan is not a part of China. We are shocked and very sorry to hear that… Being a member of Chinese, we have the responsibility to defend our motherland’s territorial integrity… From ancient times, Taiwan is part of China…”

Furthermore, they wrote:

“All of Chinese people believe that Taiwan will come back to her mother’s embrace, it is an unchangeable fact.”

According to their history, “Although Taiwan was ever occupied by foreign force… Especially Taiwan was occupied for nearly 50 years by Japan in the World War II.”

Now, first, I must admit, I am very impressed by their response. The fact that they were able to discuss such a complex issue in English and went out of their way to write a page and a half on this issue automatically gains my respect. In fact, it is my intention to write back to them, hoping to clarify some details and also to encourage them to further investigate the issue.

Although I know freedom of access to information is somewhat limited in China, and that any form of dissent towards the government is prohibited, I feel that I have a slight duty in this matter. I intend to explain to them that, as humans, we have the right to think for ourselves; that we should defend our own opinions and viewpoints; that we should investigate an issue from different angles.

I don’t want to openly say that I think the Chinese government is “wrong”; that they are “wrong.” In fact, it’s hard to say who is “right” and who is “wrong.” However, I do want to express my views on history and thinking. Even for my own educational background, I can be sure that there are many flaws in my thinking.

However, I am willing (and able) to admit that history is very much political and not always balanced in view; that we have to come to our own conclusions given solid data and support for our viewpoints. As of now, I'm still not sure what to believe when it comes to the Taiwan issue. Although the Chinese raise a good argument -- that they were at civil war during the time that Jiang Jie Shi (Cheng Kai-Shek) fled to Taiwan in exile -- this war occurred before the establishment of the P.R.C. (People's Republic of China). Would it then be a civil war?

It will be interesting to see how China reacts to the world this August for the 2008 Olympics. Already, several countries have begun to put pressure on China to change its stance on human rights. I feel that it is only a matter of time until things do change… just as slavery has ended in the US (although remnants of it remain), so too will China's approach towards its people…

YouTube

2008-04-19T02:38:00.000-07:00

By the way, you can find more videos of me DJing at: http://www.youtube.com/user/mikebeeds

I decided to change my DJ name to "Mike Beeds" for various reasons; originality; avoiding the fatal error of mispronouncing "Blueshift." One of my friends at the club said he and his friends could have sworn that the MC called my name out as "Bullshit"... So, I think Mike Beeds will work better for me at the moment...

Taking The Time To Write

2008-04-19T00:52:00.000-07:00

I apologize for neglecting to update my blog. Part of this is due to China's restrictions on blogging. Of course, part of it is also due to my laziness. However, Lily's grandfather and I had an interesting conversation this afternoon which reminded me of the importance of writing. He reminded me that it is important to take the time to write down your thoughts and experiences...

For Lily's grandfather, writing has become increasingly hard. Of course, he too is a bit lazy -- haha! But, I can understand that, with arthritis, dementia, and all the other unfortunate impairments that come with age, writing for Lily's grandfather is nearly impossible.

Today, he was recalling some old schoolmates he had in high school. Most of these classmates have since passed away, but during their time, some of them went on to become important figures in China. One of lao ye's classmates went on to become Tianjin's "president" (maybe lao ye meant mayor?). This classmate's aunt and uncle were also lao ye's teachers. He later starting naming different places he's been to in China (Shanghai, Hangzhou, Guilin, etc.).

In any case, lao ye was explaining that he has had many experiences; he has seen many things in life. Part of his life now consists of remembering the good old days; remembering the time when he was younger and was very much full of life (much in the same way as I am now).

However, with time, we begin to lose some of our memories (at least the minor details). For this reason, it becomes almost necessary that we write down our memories; or, at least do something to recall these moments in time.

Lately, I have been doing pretty much the same that I set out to do when I came back to China -- teach English, learn Chinese, and DJ. So far, it has been a lot of fun. Of course, with any routine, it starts to get old after some time. In fact, last night, I had contemplated my time in the club; if I should continue with it or move on now that I have experienced it. You know, the lights, the noise, the crowdedness, the smoke -- it takes a toll on one's health.

More importantly, I thought about the kind of impact I am making with DJing. For me, DJing has become my new passion, and with most passions, I am always excited to take this passion to new heights. First, it was basketball; however, my height and overall athleticism quickly dispelled my pursuits. But now, I am actually working and making money from DJing. I am consistently playing to a crowd of people. Of course, should I continue with DJing, I would like to take it to the next level.

For me, it has become a task; a goal that I am constantly working towards. I am always thinking of different ways to improve myself; practicing as a DJ, figuring out ways to market myself as DJ. I have to admit, it has been pretty fun. You know, I have the time and opportunity to do it now in my life, so I'm taking full advantage of it. I sort of see it as building a kind of "empire" for myself, which is what most DJs typically do as they become more successful; create your own record label; produce tracks; market yourself through the web (YouTube, etc.); meet people and make connections.

It really is a lot of fun... but, at the end of the day, what have I accomplished? What have most successful DJs accomplished? Fame? Wealth? But, what about the kind of impact they make on everyday people? I was thinking, with the amount of effort and passion I have put towards DJing, why can't I put it towards something like human rights? Why can't I become an activist and work towards making a better world for everyone? What can a DJ do for starving children in Africa? I know the last one is a bit cliche, but it rings true -- we should always ask ourselves what we are doing for the greater good.

Then, I thought, what about the happiness and fun I bring to people every night I go out and play? Can't I create a sort of escape for people with my DJing? Anyway, these have been some thoughts I recently had (last night, as a matter of fact).

Other than that, I have thought more about the following year. I am 99% certain that I will go back to the states in August (or possibly July, not sure). I want to finish out my contract (which ends in June) and then I want to do some traveling in July. Brian -- are you still coming out??

When I return, I will most likely stay in Austin. Lily and I are probably going to get a place together and I will try to find a full-time job doing... what, I don't know, haha. But, as I have done so far, I will be sure to make it interesting and exciting. I don't expect my first real job to be exciting and well-paid. However, with my hobbies, my girlfriend, and friends and family, life will still be very good :)

Here's a video from my DJing last night:

DJ Blueshift @ Scarlet

2008-03-27T11:15:00.000-07:00

Here's a video of my DJing last weekend at Scarlet:

As it turns out, it looks like I'll be staying on board with the club for an "indefinite" period of time. Last weekend was crazy fun, Lily's parents, along with a big group of friends, came out to see me. Not only did they get to see me DJ this past weekend, but I also "MC"-ed for about an hour's time too, singing songs like Depeche Mode!

I'm having a great time right now, though my schedule has been really busy these days. Monday through Thursday I teach English, and immediately following, I get ready to DJ on the weekend. My only "downtime" is Sunday, really. But, as Brian once said, it's good to be busy. I hope I'll have a chance to keep up this schedule for some time now...

I'll have more videos in the near future for sure!

P.S. I finally got my laptop back -- it broke before I left for China and it took Toshiba nearly a month to repair it!

Keepin' Busy

2008-03-12T00:41:00.000-07:00

How is everyone doing? It has been a while since I've talked with most of you, which is both good and bad. It sucks that I haven't had a chance to catch up on what everyone is doing, but at the same time it's good -- I think we have all kept busy in our lives, moving at least in some direction.

I apologize that I haven't done a better job of updating my blog. I feel it's a combination of sevearl things; laziness; internet issues; the novelty of things. I remember when I first set out on my "journey," when I was spending time in Japan, I felt that everyday was an incredible experience, something worth jotting down. Although each day still brings a new experience, it doesn't hit me full-force as it once did; I'm beginning to be able to predict the outcome of most days.

My classes are going well. I actually teach one more class than I did before, so my Thursday schedule is quite busy. From 8:30 to 11:45, I am teaching. Then, after my lunch break, I go back to teaching at 2:15 until 5:30. In between my classes, I have a 15 minute break, which is nice. Monday is a little easier, because I only have 3 classes on this day.

But, despite the predictability (i.e. I have finally adjusted fully to my new environment), I am still trying to keep things interesting, pursuing hobbies and trying to meet new people each day. In fact, yesterday was quite interesting. As most of you know, I enjoy music, and most of all, I enjoy sharing music with people. So, I thought it would be an interesting adventure to find myself a DJ job in China (either Beijing or Tianjin).

Well, Beijing wasn't so successful, because the one advantage I have -- being American -- doesn't carry much weight in China's capital. However, perhaps this will help to get my foot in the door in Tianjin, where foreigners are fewer in number. I went to a few clubs this past weekend to speak to managers and to inquire about possibly DJing for their club. Although a few clubs gave the usual shoot-down -- "we don't need anymore DJs at the moment" -- one club, Babi Club, actually showed some interest in me. So, they asked if I could come back yesterday (Tuesday) to "try out" for a DJ position.

Wow, what an exciting opportunity, right?! I was really pumped and excited that I might have a chance at DJing for a club in China. Clubs are a bit different here; they're very flashy, with many lights, ornaments and colors everywhere. Well, the excitement turned into anxiety and pressure for me when I showed back up at the club yesterday. My friend Chen Guan was also equally nervous for me. Of course, when you are nervous, everything seems to go wrong...

As one friend pointed out, I should have been more prepared. But, in my view, preparation comes with experience, right? The things which I was not prepared for were: technological issues (I should have expected this one by now). First off, my music wasn't compatible with one of the CD players the club has. Second, I was not entirely familiar with the CD players, although they are the same brand and style as the CD players I own; there's a function on my CD players which automatically cues the music for me (starts the track on a beat, which is crucial for mixing two songs). So, I quickly became flustered, because it seemed that everything was quickly stacking up as failure in front of the manager's eyes. My inability to control the equipment with mastery; my music failing on me.

Well, despite what seemed to be failure in my eyes, the manager, along with his boss, expressed interest in me. They said that I might have a chance to play for them for 1 hour this coming weekend and that they would "give me a call." As I've told my friends, I'm not expecting a call from them. I think it's better to assume the worst, so I won't be let down. And, it is still hard for me to read Chinese people; I'm not sure what they are thinking or what their next move will be. However, experience has told me not to expect too much from club managers, because business comes first. Unless you have name recognition or something considerable to bring to the table, they really have no interest in you. With that said, being American might just help me out (being American always seems to a life-saver, unless you find yourself in the Middle East!).

Other than that, I am also trying to pick up more work as an English teacher. This evening, Lily's mother will go with me to another school, where I will have an interview. If it works out, I should have another teaching job on the days when I'm not teaching (Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday). Wish me the best of luck!

Countdown to Beijing Return

2008-02-29T05:32:00.000-08:00

I feel so ashamed that I have not been more consistent in blogging and keeping this thing more alive and fresh. In a way, this has become more an obligation than fun for me. I know, at first, that might sound like a bad thing, but in a way it's also good. Since I have graduated, I rarely find myself doing anything scholastic, aside from the everyday experiences I try to interpret. Along with that, I hardly write and, although I have hardly read much, I am pushing myself to do a better job. So, for me, this blog is somewhat of a writing assignment for me, much in the same way as what I previously did for one of my Anthropology courses.

Aside from that point, I have also experienced some technological difficulties. Before leaving for California, I discovered that my laptop's motherboard no longer functioned properly. As a result, I have been without my own computer for a few weeks now (oh no! kick, cry and scream!). As Eileen mentioned, it goes to show you how dependent many people have become with technology and the internet. This has been an ongoing issue for many of the teachers (including myself) at my school in China. For the first term, we made "ends meet" (such a funny expression in this context) without internet in our rooms. However, upon the delightful hint that we would be receiving internet in our rooms for this new term, we were quickly let down... but, when people are desperate for something, they find their ways of obtaining it.

So, I am here now, in what is called "B" Building of the university campus. It's about a 10-15 minute walk from our dormitory. For the most part, the walk across the university is nice. However, sometimes you can be caught off-guard with the weather. For example, this afternoon, it was quite warm, so I left without my jacket. When I was ready to go, it was late evening and it suddenly got chilly! As I mentioned in my email, the weather has been very nice so far in China, except for a few cold moments in Beijing.

I'm tempted to continue this entry about my recent happenings in Beijing, but I have tried to keep this blog in some sort of chronological order. You know, a lot happened during my remaining weeks which are worth noting.

I think my best moments were with my friends in San Antonio and the time I spent with Brian and Lily (individually -- unfortunately). I was overly flattered and felt quite appreciated by the outgoingness of Vinnie and my other friends who had two parties for me in San Antonio. These were both very special nights for me, when I got to DJ for everyone and, for a short moment, felt somewhat like a celebrity; I thank you all from the bottom of my heart, I could never ask for better friends!

It was also very nice to be somewhat at "home" again when I went up to Ft. Worth to visit my family. We all had a chance to enjoy the Super Bowl, along with pizza and good fun. The day before, everyone took me out to eat for my birthday at P.F. Chang's, which was, although Americanized, still very delicious. I also had a great time with my cousin Chris, who will be attending the University of Texas at Arlington this fall. He has been a very close cousin to me (my closest), and I was very happy to help him in any way I could. After all, I was blessed to have Brian, my mom and my grandparents when I began college; at the very least, I hope I was able to motivate Chris just a little more.

Although my time in Texas was short (apologies), it made the 12 hour flight very worthwhile and rewarding! My last destination before going back to China was California. Although I visited Brian and Eileen the previous summer, I did not have a chance to see San Francisco, which was the first place Lily and I visited. Despite some hard emotional times, Lily and I were still able to enjoy some of the city, along with Alcatraz. I think we both really enjoyed the city tour offered to us by a local, which took us around the city and across the Golden Gate bridge. He had a lot of interesting facts to share with us as we passed some of the various districts/neighborhoods of San Francisco (which I would like to mention in my next entry). I think my favorite moment was when Lily and I walked from Fisherman's Wharf over to Lombardt St, where we walked down the crooked street. After that, we both sat down in a nestled stairway as we ate some of her yummy Ghihardelli chocolate. I also enjoyed carrying Lily up three flights of stairs too <3

The last of my California trip involved camping with Brian near Pfeiffer Beach, which was an amazing experience. We spent part of the afternoon at the beach, exploring different spots along the coast. Brian was really "jazzed" by an accessible rock that was somewhat out in the ocean, where the waves crashed. It was sort of suspenseful at times, because the waves would come in cycles, yet their force varied. Further back into a grove area, we found a place up on a short cliff where some people had built a swing from one of the trees. It was amazing and awe-inspiring to say the least.

I wish I could add more at the moment, but it is getting close to my curfew time (11pm), so I've got to make it back to my room now.

Mike

Stateside Once Again

2008-01-29T10:50:00.000-08:00

Wow, it has been a long time since I last touched this... well, my excuses are half-valid; I wanted to surprise people about my return, so I didn't think it would be wise to update my blog; or, what else would I talk about?

I have also been catching up with friends and eating a lot of the foods I missed while over in China; yeah, despite how delicious Chinese food can be, they still lack some of the best dishes, like chicken fried steak!

Well, I my return to the U.S. began with spending time up north in the Chicago/Wisconsin area. The first night I got back, Lily and I drove up to Milwaukee from Chicago, where we met up with her host family. The following day was somewhat hellish, because Lily's host family was in the process of moving and I felt somewhat obliged to help; I think it was good for me, because I need to be less selfish/spoiled sometimes. After all, her host family allowed us to stay with them (for free), and they have helped Lily out in the past.

After spending a few days with them, Lily and I ventured down to Milwaukee, staying with Lily's friend, Sarah. I felt somewhat lame during this part of the trip, because I had been severely suffering form jet-lag. Each night, when the clock struck between the hours of 8:30 pm and 9:00, I became a zombie; nothing felt better than resting my head on a pillow. I understand that it is the worst when you come back from a country that is across the Pacific Ocean (the time zone crossover in this part of the world); that day I flew, I had relived the same day twice.

So, my New Year's was very lame; I think I went to bed sometime around 10:00 pm (lame). Well, it doesn't bother me too much that I'm trading off my experiences and good moments; I had so many great moments in China that one bad night of New Year's didn't phase me. Still, I felt bad for Lily, because she sacrificed her night of fun for me just the same. I keep telling her that she should be more selfish.

However, things sort of picked up once we went back down to Chicago, which was the last leg of our Midwest trip. Here's how it went:

Just as quickly as I flew into Chicago, I was blown back out. Really, my 4-5 days in the windy city was as fast as a heartbeat, subway hopping and walking from one district to the next. It was my second time in Chicago, but Lily and I were both able to enjoy just the same as the first time.

This time, we made our efforts to cover more ground, venturing outside of the “loop” and into some of the various ethic spots. We visited such places as “Greektown,” “Little Italy” and we made our way over to Pilsen Village, where you can experience a little of “mexicanidad.” This is a new term for me, one that I learned at the Mexican Fine Arts Museum in Chicago. Basically, it is a term which tries to encompass everything that is “Mexican” – a type of identity with which most, if not all, Mexicans and Hispanic people can relate.

I spoke to a woman who works at a tea shop in the area and she said that it is quickly becoming a “hip” spot, meaning that the neighborhood will most likely undergo a lot of changes in several years to come. Much like Wicker Park, Pilsen (the largely Mexican neighborhood) will soon become “home” to yuppies and bohemian artists who have a lot of money to spare. As is the case for many urban neighborhoods with an artistic “image” and interesting historic background, Pilsen will be swallowed up by wealth and consequently evict its current residents – a phenomenon known as “gentrification.” As the tea shop lady put it, it’s a catch-22; that Pilsen should undergo more development, but subsequently force longstanding residents to leave due to rising real estate.

We really enjoyed our time at the museum, reading up on the treatment of Central America’s indigenous people; from the continual oppression they face to their syncretic religion and somewhat successful immersion into mainstream Hispanic society. Like other indigenous people, along with Africans, the Aztecs merged their polytheistic religion based on nature gods with that of the “saints” found in Catholicism.

As for Greektown and Little Italy, we found some worthwhile restaurants which served their respective foods; Lily and I had Italian subs from a mom-pop store in Little Italy – wasn’t too bad. I think the most interesting cuisine experience was an Ethiopian restaurant we found near the Green Mill. The Green Mill is a well-known night pub, where you can watch and experience live performances, ranging from poetry slam to organs and big band; they say Al Capone visited this place from time to time.

It was the first time that both Lily and I tried Ethiopian food. Not sure what to do, we began to break up what seemed to be sourdough bread and dipped it into the two dishes we ordered; one was some kind of beef and the other was a premier Ethiopian ritual choice for chicken. The chicken drumsticks were bathed in a kitchen-made sauce full of different ingredients. We both noticed that Ethiopian meals largely consist of sauce-based foods with which you can dip your bread in. We weren’t super crazy about our Ethiopian cuisine experience, but it was interesting nonetheless; actually, there’s a Moroccan place we really enjoy in Lincoln Park.

However, probably the best experience we had in Chicago was getting to see “Wicked,” the musical. Wow, I really don’t even know where to begin with describing it. Many times, I found the hair on my back standing up, with a tingly feeling running down my entire body. The music was both catchy and emotionally charged, with breathtaking stage designs and effects. The score for the musical had various contrasts between the singers and the instrumentation which really brought out the vocals and also my emotions with inside.

My favorite part of the musical came before intermission, when Elpheba and Glenda perform “Defy Gravity.” In this scene, Elpheba (who is the “Wicked Witch of the West”), discovers that the Wizard of Oz is not as grandiose, amazing, nor as virtuous as she had once thought. In fact, in the musical, the wizard takes on the antagonist role, rather than the witch; this is Wicked’s main twist of the original “Wizard of Oz” story. There are many other interesting connections between the original and the reworked version, which makes the musical not only intelligent, but fun and interesting.

The best part of it all was that Lily and I got to sit front row! They have been doing a regular drawing before every show, where they will pick a group of names out of the hat for a chance at front row (orchestra) seating; although the seating is not free, it is the same cost as balcony seats. The interesting side to this story is that Lily and I almost forwent the drawing so we could enjoy a deep dish pizza at Giordano’s; well, the interesting part to this is that I clearly remember telling Lily, “We’re not going to win this, we never win…”

Here’s a YouTube clip of “Defying Gravity,” probably the best song from the Wicked score:

Christmas in the Far East

2008-01-04T12:58:00.000-08:00

I “celebrated” Christmas by living any other day of my life in China. I woke up, checked email, chatted with mama and baba in Chinese and then was rushed off for lunch with friends/family. Being 6000 miles away from home, I sort of expected a change of routine in my life, especially with American holidays.

However, China has quickly changed its habits and practices with the onset of Western integration into Chinese society. This, I feel, is both a blessing and a tragedy around the world. Wherever you go, as a Westerner, you never feel too far from home. For a person who is homesick, this is quite comforting. On the other hand, for the soul-searching adventurer, it is somewhat upsetting that you can’t entirely escape the grasps of Western consumerism and business. Likewise, for the Anthropologist, differences in culture become somewhat blurred and you are no longer dealing with an isolated group of people.

With that said, nothing will ever exactly be replicated. When the Chinese celebrate Thanksgiving, they do so with a different bird other than turkey; I celebrated my Chinese Thanksgiving with pigeon. At the same time, outside the realm of business and such places as Pizza Hut, most Chinese families still do not overtly celebrate such holidays as Thanksgiving and Christmas.

Most Chinese people will agree that it is more of a youthful thing to embrace American holidays. As I mentioned in my email, going out to the pub for a drink, or meeting up with friends at McDonald’s is a simple, yet pleasant way to feel “American” for a moment.

Now that I have mentioned the obvious, I can say that I did not miss Christmas at all. I don’t want this to cause offense for anyone, but I feel that “gifts” and the presence of God (Jesus Christ) – for those who believe –are ever around me. Each day I breathe and live, these are my precious gifts. Likewise, I celebrate the “birth” of Jesus by embracing this life and opportunity with great passion. So, whether I am stepping foot on the Asian continent, or walking along the ocean of Fernando de Noronha, I try to remain enlightened. This enlightenment comes with the knowledge of knowing that life is short, yet in life, nothing is short at all.

Sure, our physical abilities have limits, but our mind can reach great depths. We can never go hundreds of years back in time to witness the decline of the Ming Dynasty, but our imagination can bring to life the pages in a history book. Likewise, when I put on my headphones and allow the music to flow, I can ponder creation, the origin of the universe and my purpose in life.

I agree, such things as poverty, one’s natural disposition and one’s environment can place limits on the mind’s ability to exceed. With this in mind, I look upon the opportunities I have had in life with extreme gratitude. I also attempt in every way to extend my life-given opportunities to others. I believe others have enough problems to understand and realize the struggles of life; they do not need me to “remind” them. However, I can remind them of the good things in life. This, I believe, is the “Christmas gift” I try to give to everyone, each and every day.

Tianjin Explorations

2007-12-15T06:20:00.000-08:00

I thought it would be proper to explore my new town, so here are some pictures of the Nankai district in Tianjin. Here you can visit Tianjin's TV tower, as well as Tianjin's water park ("shui shang gong yuan"):

China: A Lesson in Cultural Sensitivity

2007-12-12T04:44:00.000-08:00

“A friend once told me that, if you ever want to complain, you should do so with a foreigner.”

This was what Ryan, another foreign teacher, had to say to me over dinner last night. We touched on a series of issues which I think touch every foreigner’s life in China; and not just China, but other countries as well. These are the issues which could be subsumed under the heading of “culture shock”; such issues as privacy, and social norms for human interaction and relationships.

Back to Ryan’s comment – we both agree that “complaining” about one’s shortcomings towards a native isn’t a very fruitful action, and for a number of reasons. First, it seems that China has this over abundance of national pride which can be felt in almost all Chinese. I believe this is owed to a number of reasons itself; I think it is a “natural” outcome for a communist country, considering that, in the 20^th century, many communist states actively pursued propagandist tactics and did whatever else they could to maintain their credibility; China should be proud of its heritage, given the fact that China is one of the oldest civilizations in the world; people naturally feel an affinity towards their nation, as if the nation is part of them.

This last point is interesting in that it also affects me (I believe). Normally I tend not to follow the wave of patriotism in America – flag flying, flag decals on vehicles, Civil War reenactments, etc. However, in times that I have encountered criticism of my country from my foreign friends back home, I do find myself feeling somewhat offended and “having” to defend my country. Again, it’s as if I am having to defend who I am and everything which stands for me. After all, all that is America – football games, a bowl of cereal, Thanksgiving, barbeque, Texas – comprise my childhood background and are the elements of my life.

Ryan had asked himself if he were doing himself an injustice by holding back on his comments of Chinese society and life in Tianjin; or if he were doing the correct thing by glossing over (“sugarcoating”) his thoughts as he expressed them towards his Chinese students and friends. Ryan (as well as me) is a firm believer in being true to oneself – that you shouldn’t put on an “act” for others. However, I do admit, I often give into self-monitoring and social norms. In other words, I end up acting a certain way to please others in a given moment, despite the truth that it doesn’t accurately represent my personality and views on life.

With that said though, I think it is a natural outcome that we should feel the need to take on different roles for different people. As Anthropology and life experience have shown me, our “self” – the person who we perceive ourselves to be – is a concoction of others. In other terms, your self-definition is not only defined by you, but it is also defined by the people with whom you associate and spend most of your time. You know, if enough people tell you that your Elvis Presley, you might begin to believe that you really are (maybe not, but you might for a second play with the idea).

Marc often cites Jean-Paul Sartre on this very issue; that often times, “people can be hell.” I’m sure many of you often dislike that feeling of not being at liberty to express your feelings or thoughts around certain people. You almost feel as if others are trying to “control” you and your behavior.

However, in the case of being a foreigner in China, there really isn’t anyone specific who is “controlling” you, but it is you who is controlling your actions and beliefs. When you are in a foreign environment, you no longer have familiar ques to guide your reactions towards others’ behavior, because first of all, the behavior itself is different. Second, you can’t really guess how others will react to your reaction. So, if you have any sensibility, you’ll put the brakes on some of your immediate responses towards others.

I failed to mention that our self-definition is also the result of an inherited culture and history at birth; that being American already defines your core (who you are). I know this is an obvious statement – I was born in America, so of course I’m American. But, I think a lot of times the “obvious” becomes somewhat obscured by its everyday presence. It’s like thinking about walking when you are walking; no one really has to think about it anymore, because it becomes “second nature.”

I think this is exactly what gets a lot of people in trouble, especially when they are caught in a foreign environment. When you finally realize that you are “no longer in Kansas anymore,” wow – you better watch out! It begins to play tricks with your thinking and emotions. I think this is what causes the “U-shape” emotional experience that most people warn you against before you leave for another country. That is, in the beginning, everything is exciting and new, but once you have hit a routine, you find yourself in a slump. Little things start to annoy and irritate you; such as the way people walk, how they smile, the way they dress and comb their hair, how they eat their meals.

You no longer allow room for cultural sensitivity. Rather, you become too quick to judge others and their actions. You ask yourself, “why can’t they just do it right?” Well, what exactly is “right”? I think the lines do become blurred between “right” and “wrong” when you give space for cultural differences. This is actually an ongoing debate in the field of Anthropology, especially in terms of foreign intervention. When should an Anthropologist step in and say, “Hey, I think what you are doing as a cultural practice is incorrect and a harm to society”?

It truly is a challenge to remain level-headed and to maintain a sensitive approach towards other cultures. You know, we throw this word around – “culture” – as if we know exactly what it means. Well, I will be the first to admit that I can’t really describe this word or accurately define it for you (another Anthropological dilemma). And, even with a scholastic background in culture and in the field of Anthropology, I often find myself bewildered with Chinese social habits; what’s more, I want to easily denounce some of these habits as “ignorant” or “completely unnecessary.”

Of course, this is too rash of a decision for someone like me who hopes to better understand others. What’s more, this leads to a lot of the misunderstandings which people have for one another. As my students have said in class, “with the rise of technology, the world is smaller and smaller.” Contact with other countries is more real now and quite uncomfortably close. It’s like our technology is undoing the work of tectonic forces. All of the countries are coming back together – man is playing his global puzzle and each country is just one piece of the puzzle. If we wish to avoid tearing off the artwork of each puzzle piece, we have to be culturally more sensitive.

The Teaching Rollercoaster

2007-12-11T00:03:00.000-08:00

I have a lot to say for my experiences over the past week. As I mentioned in my previous blog entry, I took part in my school’s English speaking competition as a judge. To say the very least, it was very entertaining and enjoying. I was surprised by the speaking abilities of some of the contests. Actually, I feel that they all could, more or less, carry on a conversation. Of course, they still need work with their pronunciation in much the same way that I need more work with my tones.

What the contest highlighted for me once more is the influence the West has had all over the world. It is an understatement to simply say that the West has been important in the last century. The fact that all Chinese, since primary school, have had English as a compulsory course reflects the role of the West in business, development and international relations.

However, I wonder what language might be the next important? Brian and I had talked about this once before. All other countries’ people are expected to learn English in school. Well, what about English-speaking countries such as the U.S., England and Australia? What language should we be expected to study and learn? Spanish? Chinese?

I thought this would be a good question to ask one of the contestants in the competition. Well, the result wasn’t so profound or intellectually stimulating; I’m not sure if this is due to the limits of speaking English, or if most students in China lack critical thinking (this is what Ryan, Sean and Mr. Brown assume). As for me, I know no question has a simple answer (pun unintended), and I’m sure that some students are bright, whereas other students still need development in their thinking. Of course, the contestant said Chinese should be the language for English-speakers to study, but I don’t really remember what else she had to say (it was either spoken to slowly or in chopped-up thoughts that I could not follow).

It’s not that I have a negative attitude or disinterest in my or other students at school, but I’ve noticed that lately, my mind has been wandering. For example, yesterday in class, my students gave a presentation on technology and development. I have to say, I was really ecstatic to see the first class’ performance; one group even made a PowerPoint presentation with pictures! However, the remaining two classes sort of just trailed downhill, reaching the bottom of no creativity. At that point, I remember sort of just gazing into “no man’s land.” I was asking myself if I have failed as a teacher, as well as evaluating my first semester’s performance. I wanted to know what I had done wrong and what I could do to improve my teaching for the next term.

I think I need to completely change the structure of my class, and have it more presentation-based. Although the presentations were mixed in their success, they did force the students to stand in front of the class and speak English.

1. My classes can have 10 presentations, which will be their grade

I don’t think I will give exams or writing assignments like I did this semester.

1. With exams, some students will only come to class on exam day

2. I lack a T.A., so I am stuck doing all the grading myself (it really sucks!)

I think I was a little ambitious with the mid-term. I had my students not only do an oral exam, but I also had them answer 10 reading/listening questions. In hindsight, emphasizing writing was a poor move on my part. After all, my classes are “Oral English” and the students already have other classes that focus on writing. However, my decision came after discovering my students’ reluctance to speak English in class. I also figured that, if their writing were to improve out of continuous practice, it would somehow enhance their ability to speak as well. Well, I’m not so sure that this was such great thinking…

As Liu lao shi said, teaching is one of the most (well, I think he said the most) challenging professions. I believe this, given the human dynamic of teaching. After all, you are not working with inanimate objects, but students who are complex individual thinkers. These students have different needs; their motivations are different. With that, you still need to find a method to encourage/motivate them all, and have some kind of meaningful impact on their lives.

The Joys and Challenges of Teaching

2007-12-07T05:51:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was another high point in my experiences thus far in China. My school hosted an English speaking contest for students of all majors. Naturally, several students from the English department participated, along with students from International Accounting.

Normally, I go to my school twice a week to teach my classes. When I am not teaching, I usually stay within the city's boundaries, either spending time at the main campus, or staying with Lily's parents (on the weekends).

As a result, the time I have with my students is very limited, unless I decide to go out of my way to make the 1 hour trip to my school even on non-teaching days. Not to mention, most of my students have busy schedules, so they would only be able to meet up with me during certain times of the day.

However, yesterday's English competition allowed me to spend the afternoon and late evening at school, where I was able to meet with my students outside of class. My school asked if I could be a judge in their competition; they said they'd provide transportation back to the main campus after the competition was over.

I took this opportunity to invite as many students as I could for dinner. A few of my students who regularly see me -- Anthony and Christina -- also helped to arrange our dinner. It was one of the greatest moments as a teacher -- to be able to develop a closer/stronger connection with my students. At the table, we ended up having 10 students show up for dinner! I was oozing with joy and excitement.

As most of you know, although I can be a selfish person at times, one of the greatest joys in life for me is to see others happy and in harmony. One of the best moments is when all of my friends can come together in harmony, when we all can enjoy each other's company. This has to be one of the best characteristics of China; most of my students know each other, and they are all very good friends with each other. So, I was able to invite several students from some of my 6 classes, and it was more like a reunion between friends :)

Although some of them were shy, most of them seemed happy to see me outside of my role as "teacher." You know, I am a down-to-Earth guy and I have repeatedly told them that this job is more than just teaching and giving grades. They too wish to develop a friendship with me, one that can lead to a greater relationship between the U.S. and China.

I want to leave an imprint on their lives, though this goal is quite ambitious. However, with a genuine smile and an outgoing/happy personality, I think I can make life a little different for my students. Some of them have already asked me about the future of my teaching and stay in China. They were happy to hear that I would be in China for another semester to teach :)

I never thought that it would become this way, but I too have developed a strong attachment for my students. I even began considering a contract extension, so that I could stay on board for another year...

I think this might be one of the hardest aspects of teaching. Each year, you are given a new set of students, some good and some bad. However, indifferent to your feelings and attachment to your students, you are forced to say "goodbye" each year to the ones you have taught and enjoyed.

For the moment, my students have sort of become my "family," a family that I don't want to see disunited. Cathy and Nadia, the other foreign teachers, have also developed this feeling for their students. The good moments seem to come and go too quickly. We all wish that we had more time with our students this year.

I'm not really sure what the future will be of my schedule, and I am not sure if I will be teaching the same students next year. However, this is something which I hope for with all of my heart. This I realized as we passed the food around the table; when I felt a stronger connection with my students...

I'll write more on the competition in my next blog.

Remembering Tokyo

2007-11-29T22:48:00.000-08:00

I would like to go back to Tokyo someday soon...

照品 (Zhao Pin) "Pictures"

2007-11-29T04:27:00.000-08:00

Here are pictures from Lily's return home:

Here, we all went to visit Lily's grandparents. They were so happy to see her; abu (grandma) cried, because she didn't get to say "goodbye" to Lily the last time Lily left China...

Here, we are with Lily's cousin and cousins' future wife! We're also in the new apartment:

In this picture, Lily and Lu Kai (with Wang Ying and I) are in the back of a rickshaw (it's a like a little carriage attached to the back of a bicycle):

We're all at "Ying Kou Dao," a popular shopping district in Tianjin:

Lily and I at the new apartment ^_^ :

Thanksgiving in Tianjin. We ate with Lily's mom's co-worker, Lu Da Da, and one of their friends who has helped out mama's school in the past. This night was interesting because, after drinking quite a bit, Lu Da Da had a few things to say which should have been left unspoken, haha ;)

Lily and baba in the same evil hotel where I had to say "goodbye" to Lily before...

But, it was still very enjoying, because we celebrated Lily's birthday early! Her birthday is on December 4th ;)

The cake is a little lopsided, because I wasn't careful when I carried it back to the hotel >_<
It was still a great surprise for Lily, because while she and mama baba were in the restaurant, I snuck into a bakery next door and had them quickly make a cake! :D

It was a lot of fun. I know there will be plenty of more experiences to enjoy in the future :)

"The Return of Lily"

2007-11-26T23:02:00.000-08:00

--The title should be more heart-felt and romantic, but I had to make a reference to Star Wars.--

I should first say, I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving. It is the second holiday (in my view) so far that I was not able to experience, having been in China for almost 4 months now; the first was Halloween. Sure, you had Labor Day, and several other US holidays, but for me, I have always enjoyed Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years.

Well, I didn't feel too homesick, because my girlfriend came back for the week! Words can't express the many emotions that ran through my head as baba and I waited for Lily at the Beijing airport... Although my situation is very minor in comparison to many other couples out there in the world -- many military men don't see their family for years -- I was finally able to experience the beauty of reunion between two lovers. I can now appreciate the many times I see troops wishing their families "Happy Christmas" over the television, or when people feel a rush of excitement at the airport when they see their loved ones once again...

It's that feeling when your heart is thumping, many thoughts/memories are racing through your head, and you feel that you have finally come home to something. Even though Lily came to me, I felt that I was momentarily back home in Austin, like the many times Lily would ride her bike over to my apartment.

However, interestingly, and Lily admitted to this as well, it wasn't quite like home anymore. You know, when you're home, everything feels normal and comfortable, or at least that's how things should be. Except, when I reunited with Lily inside KFC, it wasn't the same -- it felt different. In fact, I had to hold and touch her for quite a while to know that it really was her again... I'm sure I made others around me feel the same awkwardness, but I wanted to smell her again; feel her face and her hair against mine; kiss her once more. It was like taking a shower after camping for 5 straight days. Haha, you know that feeling Brian; it's a great feeling of relief.

With that said, it really didn't take long for us to get back into the "swing of things" once again. In fact, we even argued some, just like an old couple would over dinner.

I should say that, with the mixture of the old and the new, things truly are different from what they once were. People might ask, "Is that a good or a bad thing?" I would like to say "neither," but if I had to choose, I guess I would say "good." As my friend Marc likes to put it, "change is good." I finally felt somewhat of a change in myself through my interaction with Lily. At least, this is what I tell myself. I mean, surely I've changed after spending close to 4 months in an entirely new environment, right?

Likewise, I'm sure Lily has changed, having lived with two of her friends with whom she never lived before. I think individually, our chemistry has changed. Moreover, our chemistry together subsequently has changed as well. Not to mention, my relationship with Lily's parents has greatly developed, which changes the outlook Lily and I have for each other. You know, I'm not just a simple boyfriend anymore, one with whom you can periodically date. At the same time, Lily means much more to me now (not that she didn't mean anything to me before).

I believe this has a great influence on our relationship now. I think it makes both of us more sensitive towards each other in the sense that we have greater expectations which we wish to be fulfilled. She wants me to "always" be happy; I want her to "always" agree with what I say; I want this; she wants that. In a way, it is almost like being married, but without a ring and a huge wedding bill waiting to be paid off...

I'm not saying it's a bad thing -- but it certainly is different from the way things were back in February. I think the best thing that Lily and I have for each other is "care." One of Josh's friends in South Korea told me that, for a woman to argue with you, or for her to become "irrational" -- get upset over something "little" -- shows that she actually cares about you. If a woman thought of you as just some play thing, or someone who was only temporary in your life, maybe she wouldn't care that all of your co-workers are female, or that you were leaving for another country; maybe she'd just dump you...

Moreover, I feel that Lily and I are also willing to admit to our faults/mistakes, which takes an ounce of pride away (maybe more, depending on the mistake). In my mind, great communication requires apologies once in a while, as well as humbleness on the part of each communicator. It really means a lot to me when Lily says she's "sorry," or that she made a mistake. It is also important for me to sometimes owe our arguments to a mistake I made, because I know neither of us is perfect.

Alma once said that, "to really know a person, to develop a deep connection with the person, you have to argue." Well, maybe I changed the words up a bit, but she said that you really don't know a person if you haven't argued with them on a consistent basis.

I love you Lily...

"South and North" -- The Chinese Take

2007-11-26T22:54:00.000-08:00

So, we were in the car on our way to the airport to drop off Lily, and her mother had the following to say about “southerners”:

Like Jewish people, [Chinese] southerners are hardworking, save their money and are (in comparison to northerners) smarter.

It seems that some stereotypes are more global than we imagined …

It’s interesting in that China, like the US, is divided up into a “north” and “south” region. More interesting is that the qualities mama attributed to the southerners are (in my opinion) a reversal with respect to the US. There was a website which rated the IQ of Americans by the state in which they preside and all the northern states were (on average) smarter than the southern states; they did this around the time of the 2004 elections to reflect attributes related to party affiliation. I also feel that throughout American history, northern states have typically been the “first” with such areas as industrialization, emancipation, suffrage, etc.

Considering that our country almost split as a result of a civil war, I am somewhat surprised that China managed to remain united itself. If you take into account language and culture, in some ways, the north is almost like another country with respect to the southern area of China. One anthropologist/social scientist once said that the greatest barrier between societies and their cultures is language. This is because language is a mode of communication through which we can better understand one another. Once you have learned a language, you will begin to see that differences aren’t as great as you once thought before... however, in the case of north and south China, Mandarin and Cantonese appear to be completely different from each other, only hanging together on a tiny “traditional” thread. My girlfriend can read traditional Chinese, but spoken Cantonese for her is like “Greek to me.”

I believe Mao Ze Dong’s province lies in the south too. I should know this, but I am not really sure why Mao chose Beijing as the next (and current) capital of China. Lily’s father mentioned that, throughout Chinese history, the capital has moved to different locations throughout China, having once been in the south.

Supposedly on the day of Mao Zedong’s death, China experienced a massive earthquake which killed close to 200,000 people. Mao Zedong also met with a fortune teller who mentioned a set of numbers that represented how long he would rule and at what age he would die.

Another Chinese superstition is that, if a pot of tea is pointing at you, it will bring you bad fortune; this at least a Tianjin belief, so many people have their pot of tea pointing away from the table.

Speaking of “folklore,” I am looking through a book I bought on North Korea. It talks about Kim-Il Sung, the predecessor of Kim Jong-Il, in the first chapter. Supposedly, Kim-Il Sung was revered as the “next coming of Christ” who raised the north of Korea out of Japanese imperialist “shackles.” What’s more amazing is that many North Koreans sincerely believed this biased view. Kim-Il Sung was father to all North Koreans and to “prove” this, most parentless children from the Korean War were “adopted” by Kim-Il Sung during the formidable years of North Korea.

This followed Kim-Il Sung’s supposed single-hand defeat of the Japanese imperialists, along with the Americans who tried to “recapture” Korea. According to “the books,” Kim-Il Sung and his guerrilla army, without help from anyone else (including the Chinese), were able to fight off imperialist incursions on their land.

Well, so far that is what I’ve read. I will continue to read more and share what I learn along the way.

Perspectives on Teaching

2007-11-19T06:26:00.000-08:00

For one of Lily’s government assignment, she was made to analyze differing perspectives on the IRS. Many people dislike the IRS and wish for the Internal Revenue Service to dramatically change. However, depending on each taxpayer’s circumstance – how much they make, how much they pay in taxes, how much taxes benefit them – these taxpayers wish for different changes within the IRS.

In much the same way, my teaching style and foresight as a teacher of English is taken with differing opinion from my students and other Chinese teachers.

I had the opportunity to hear out both a Chinese teacher and my student from last week, Christina, all in the same day (Wednesday 11/07/2007).

On this day, we were given heavy fog, which was another lesson within itself. In Tianjin, fog can be a serious problem, because it is much worse than anything you’ll ever witness in America (or, at least this has been the case for me). I’m not sure if it is a mixture of pollution and Tianjin’s close proximity to the ocean, but the fog, in the eyes of the Chinese authorities, can be enough to shut down a highway.

As we were stuck on the bus which takes me to and from my school, I learned from a Chinese teacher the reasoning behind our delay. His name, Sun Jing Jin, comes from his father being from Beijing and his mother being from Tianjin (or, it could be the other way around…). Just for convenience, I will refer to him by his English name – “Wells.”

Since I have been in China, teaching English, I have come across some of the most absurd English names. I apologize, I am not trying to criticize the Chinese or make them look like buffoons in any way; but this can be a serious problem if they – my students and others – ever want to work for an American company. I’ve seen names like “Fish,” “Lemon tree,” and even “Kill.” One of the other teachers, Nadia, has a student whose name is “Snake.” Well, when you compare these names to “Wells,” it’s not such a bad name; still a bit odd though…

So, Mr. Wells explained to me that whenever there exists a certain level of fog, the authorities close down the highway, because – in his words – Chinese drivers are not disciplined enough to heed caution in the face of fog clouds. Well, that was just one simple insight.

Wells, we got to talking about teaching and the current situation in China with teaching English. As Wells put it, teaching English in college is known to be a “disaster.” First of all, funding has been and will always be an issue for Chinese schools. With that said, most classes are oversized, and our students are only able to see us once a week due to a shortage of foreign teachers (and, again, funding); keep in mind that I get paid more than most Chinese teachers who teach twice as much as me!

This is a sad reality that most Chinese universities face as they try to provide their students with the best education possible. When it comes to English, foreign teachers are greatly needed. However, our living standards a bit higher, and for it to be at all worthwhile, Chinese universities have to compensate their teachers at a level which (in most cases) greatly surpasses that of other, Chinese teachers.

However, when it comes to teaching, funding is not only the issue; another is one which is more cultural. Since my students were toddlers, they were raised and groomed to possess a disposition not attuned to language acquisition. In other words, my students are afraid to make mistakes, because they have been taught by most of their teachers that making mistakes is a grave mistake; again, in the words of Wells.

Wells explained that even he, a Chinese teacher, finds it difficult to encourage student participation; students just don’t want to lose face. Moreover, Wells agreed that, to learn a language, you have to attempt, “fail,” learn from your “failures,” and progress.

Back to the issue of over sized classrooms, it doesn’t help my students that they most perform in front of many of their classmates. What’s more, my own ability to control the classroom is naturally lost. As Wells put it, you can only expect your students to have a certain level of attention towards you as you attempt to encourage student participation. What I mean is, using my teaching method – hand-picking each student to practice speaking – leaves me vulnerable to losing control over my other students. It’s, as they say, a double-edged sword…

Sure, I could group my students, but I’m still losing control, because I can’t monitor every group; my students will naturally want to revert to Chinese when I am not paying attention.

With student participation, it isn’t just intimidation, but some of my students have this belief that they do not need to really practice in college; that, most of them will receive their practice when they go off to work. I should say, it is a mistake to over generalize – not every student thinks in this way – but this was what Christina had to tell me last week. She said she tried encouraging her roommates to go with her to see me. However, they were – surprise surprise – reluctant to go because their English is “bad,” and they don’t necessarily need to practice their English these days. No, they can wait until they are part of the workforce, when it truly matters.

However, as Mr. Brown said, “Which is better, to make a mistake in my class, or to make a mistake on the job, where you could be fired?”

I really don’t understand this logic – of waiting until you work to practice English – but I have also been told that firing people is not very common in China. Ready, set… go! (I am ready for you all to clarify this for me)

In the end, Wells said that I shouldn’t expect to make great progress with my students. Rather, I should look to inspire my students and at least influence one, if not a few, of my students; to actually make a difference in their lives.

It’s not a gloomy outlook as most would think; it’s more of a realistic one, given our conditions as English teachers at a Chinese university. My respect for Wells greatly changed after this day… before, I thought he was just some annoying Chinese teacher who was so presumptuous as to recommend this and that to me; he really doesn’t hold back on his thoughts, an approach quite different from most Chinese people…

Afterwards, I joked with Wells that he should write a book on teaching.

The title: Teaching From a Chinese Status Quo

Author: Sun Jing Jin, aka “Wells”

Then he added, “You will need to co-author with me.”

Co-author: Meng, Maike, aka “Mikey,” aka “Michael Biediger”

"Summer Palace Dream"

2007-11-12T20:19:00.000-08:00

Art is one of life’s most precious gifts, allowing us to share with the outer world our inner belongings.

Over the last few months, I have had the opportunity to travel and see another part of the world – China.

During this time, I have seen many beautiful places, met many gracious and wonderful people and I have had the chance to grow as both an individual and an artist.

As a way to reflect this appreciation and overall growth, I have put together a mix and visual interpretation, which I hope you all will enjoy…

The overall theme of this artistic endeavor is Beijing’s “Summer Palace,” a breathtaking place full of history and awe.

For many years during the later dynasties, China’s rulers would live here during the summer time.

More than just the palace itself, this endeavor also encompasses the themes of “summer” and “love.” We often find ourselves falling in love during the summer. I too found myself falling in love with a special someone; she has given me more inspiration than I could ever imagine ;)

The mix transitions from a “dreamy state,” where the two lovers have become inseparable and “mesmerized,” to a clubbier atmosphere, specifically Beijing’s “shi cha hai,” a famous pond-side club area. It is here where the two lovers remain together until the “dream” is over…

In this way, I dedicate this mix to my amazing girlfriend, Meng Ying. I will be “waiting here for you,” my love…

Lastly, the theme of “family” also finds its way in this mix. China has taught me an important lesson: family is a sacred gift in this life.

In the end, I want to dedicate this endeavor to my late grandfather and mother, two people who have made this world truly amazing. I remember the late summer evenings, when I would be out in grandpa’s backyard, enjoying the breeze and breathe of life with both my grandparents and my mother…

Through their love and support, I was able to be who I am today. I can’t thank them enough, and I will certainly never forget the impact they made in this world…

I hope you all enjoy, I put my entire heart and soul into this…

Love,

Michael “Blueshift” Biediger

Play here:

https://webspace.utexas.edu/msb64/Summer%20Palace%20Dream.mp3

Track List:

01. Swayzak – Smile And Receive (Apparat Remix)
02. Solarstone – Late Summer Fields (Solarstone Deeper Sunrise Mix)
03. Thrillseekers – Waiting Here For You (Breakfast Club Remix)
04. Deli, Demetreus – Better Love (Axwell Remix)
05. Miguel Migs – Mesmerized Shur I Kan Guilty Pleasures Vocal
06. Hawk – Emerald Mine feat Sasja (Ilya Malyuev Remix)
07. Mobin Master – Show Me Love feat Chavez Safari Mix
08. Eelke Kleijn, Nick Hogendoorn – Where Are My Goggles (Remix)
09. Remo – Ivision
10. Popof – My Toyz
11. Solarstone – Late Summer Fields (Alucard’s Vocal Mix)

Bai jiu -- "hate it or love it"

2007-11-02T05:26:00.000-07:00

Some people love it, and some people hate it... it's very close to hard liquor, yet it is quite different from anything you'd ever drink in the states. I thought I'd comment on this drink -- what they call "bai jiu" -- because it is the Chinese drink of choice, especially during the winter. It has become a bit colder out now, and most Chinese people, along with their "hot pot," enjoy a glass of bai jiu; hot pot is fairly straight forward -- a hot pot full of vegetables and meats.

It would make sense for me to talk a bit about bai jiu at this point, considering that I had just recently drank quite a bit with "lu da da," Lily's mothers' co-worker/friend. Man, Lu da da loves any type of "jiu" -- alcohol -- the man can't live without it. I like him very much, he's a fun guy who keeps things interesting. When the meal seems to have died down, Lu da da never hesitates to bring out more alcohol... and, despite the concerns of mama baba, I thought I'd "entertain" lu da da for a bit this evening...

Right now, I'm a that point where I'm becoming quite sleepy; I think I need another glass to jump-start my wits, or at least further envigorate me. However, I am sipping, bit by bit, on some tea. Something which is quite different from the states, Chinese people often drink tea. In fact, it is expected at every single meal, much as you'd expect a fork and a knife. I have my assumptions for this... consider that tap water is undrinkable in China, so everyone has to boil their water... why not add a few herbs to your boiled water to make it a little more interesting?

Speaking of that, it will be interesting to see how China transforms from its development; how much of its past habits will be fused with the new, and how much will be abandoned...

What I mean is, China has social habits which seem to be in line with China's status quo; China's level of development, what it currently has and what it lacks. If, for example, China had drinkable water, would they be so inclined to drink tea?

Although this is a poor example, consider other points. Most Chinese mothers do not rely on diapers for their children. What is the reason for this? Or, what about China's approach towards the infrastructure of its cities? Certainly, now that China is "open" to the rest of the world, it can borrow ideas from other countries in its approach towards development.

However, how far is China willing to go to change its methods? I'm sure I am not making any sense at this point, but believe me -- I'm touching on something that most people also consider.

1. China is "developing." You'll agree with me on this.
2. Development brings change.
3. A country will subsequently change its habits as it adopts this "change."
4. Most often, a society will not entirely abandon its previous habits, but fuse these habits with the new.

My friend Sean commented no this in his "'J' is for juxtaposition." It seems that development and growth is occuring so fast that China barely has a change to "catch up." Apartments are going up, peoples' standard of living is increasing, but China's methods are lagging behind.

It's the same as what Reagan once said -- rather than give the fish, why not teach them how to fish?

Part of this results from China's countryside falling behind in China's race towards "improvement." Improvement in what? That's for the Chinese government to decide...

Yet, in much the same way, China is being built, from the bottom-up, by its countryside people. Maybe some of you may neglect to accept, but America was built by the very people it discriminates -- non-white people. In the same way, Chinese farmers and countryside people -- people who are disadvantaged -- continue to be the choice of labor for China's rapid development.

However, are they ready to accept a new China? A China that has different methods, different habits for dealing with everyday problems. Even Lily once said that, one reason for China's lack of environmental conscience results from the lack of education on the part of the farmer.

Any way, I'd hate for this to turn into a "Simpsons" episode -- man, that show needs to end. Back to the point of bai jiu. It's a very nice drink during the winter, will make you feel warm inside. In fact, most Chinese people enjoy heating up the bai jiu in a bowl of hot water, so that the bai jiu itself is warm in taste. I'll see what I can do Brian, I'd love to bring back some for you, but Lily's parents worry about customs; same for you too Tommy!

Again, I keep dreaming in my head of you all coming to visit me in China... please, if there is one thing you could ever do for me in my life... if I should write one thing on my grave... it would be that you should have come to visit me in China...

I'm ready to show you all the world.

1. Chinese food
2. Beijing
3. Tianjin
4. massages
5. Chinese people
6. me
7. southern China

I love you all and can't wait to give you all so much -- everything you all have given to me in my life...

An Inconvenient "Teaching"

2007-11-01T05:18:00.000-07:00

Today in class, I discussed - upon some students' request - the weather and the effects the weather has on our daily lives. Of course, you are all thinking, what an easy topic; however, try talking about childhood memories in Chinese, and then you will understand how simple subjects can be the equivalent of a college course.

But, I agree with you - it wasn't enough to have my students only discuss the effects the weather has on their emotions. Yeah, we all know that "I am happy when it is sunny." I thought I would take it a step forward and discuss the effects we have on the weather. In other words, I had them talk about the hotly debated issue around the world today - "Global Warming."

To do this, I had them first talk about the basic principles of "Global Warming." You know, light from the sun is trapped within the earth's atmosphere, and with the emission of more and more greenhouse gases, more light/radiation is trapped within the atmosphere; thus, the world becomes hotter.

I was actually quite surprised by their understanding of Global Warming, no less in English. I mean, I'm sure they are some of the most intelligent students I'll ever have; though, you might never perceive this due to the language impediment.

But, this led me to wonder what is taught to these students in school, how the Chinese government views Global Warming, and what China plans to do in the near future to combat Global Warming. After all, with China's recent aims at rapidly developing, more and more people are driving vehicles, factories are using coal instead of better, more renewable resources, and China is polluting the environment at an alarming rate.

I thought I could help get my point across with a little help from ol' Al. Yeah, I showed them parts of "An Inconvenient Truth," where they could hear the former Vice President discuss at length the phenomenon of Global Warming.

I wasn't trying to persuade them of the issue; in fact, they all overwhelmingly agreed that Global Warming is a reality. Rather, I was giving them just another lesson in English, and I also wanted to make them just a little more environmentally-conscious. This, I felt I owed to them, given the wonderful experiences Brian has given to me, when we would go hiking in the mountains, when he would hound me for not recycling. As always, thanks for everything bro ;)

I agree that change only comes in small steps. Perhaps, after this simple Oral English class, my students will remember this lecture when they next decide to throw trash on the ground; maybe not...

I wonder if, at all, I am making any change in class; making change in the lives of my students. One thing I always keep in mind is that, change must come from both sides; the teacher has to make his/her efforts, and so do the students.

However, I still find student participation to be a challenge. Although I say this, I am still surprised from time to time. For example, yesterday, one of my students made an appointment to see me outside of class. This turned out to be a good opportunity for both of us; she was able to practice her English, and I was able to understand more about my students.

I discovered a few discrepancies between my understandings of my teaching methods and those of my students. I learned from this student - Christina - that most of her classmates are under the impression that, in America, courses consist largely of fun and games. She told me that, in movies, she had seen quite a bit of this, where the teacher taught via games. Haha, if only this were the truth...

No, I told her that this was a misconception, one of many found in movies. On the contrary, most teachers/professors lecture in front of the class, whereby the students take down notes. This is precisely the approach I take towards my classes; not sure if it is "good," or "bad."
I also learned from Christina that most of the students found me shy at first, but have since come to find me more "interesting." She said that they came to this conclusion as a result of their previous instructor being somewhat of a "monkey." This was how Christina described him - a man who was "up and down" all the time. In fact, she said that, one time, he threw a pen at a student, because he thought the student was not paying attention...

You know, we often forget how influential we really are in our lives; how we lead by example, and the impressions we establish for others to follow. I know my role as a foreigner in China; I recognize the importance of setting a positive example before Chinese people, because they will hold, with high regard, my behavior. I don’t want to believe that I have the power to ultimately decide China’s relationship with the US, but I know that these are the small steps towards a strong relationship... that is, my attitude and approach these days...

The part which is "inconvenient" about my position is that I have to undo years of training my students have received within their school system. First of all, many students are expected to be error-free, and it goes back to the possibility of "losing face." I found out from Christina that most of my students dislike my method of hand-picking them to participate in class. This results from the large class size and students' lack of courtesy towards their classmates when mistakes are made; they like to snicker at other's faults. So, many students dislike having to speak English in front of others.

However, I feel it will be the only way that they can practice their spoken English. The reality is that many of my students have been studying English for quite a while - some almost 10 years. However, more often than not, they have had instructors whose English is substandard, making the students' ability to speak English quite difficult.

Given these circumstances, I am always aiming to do my best, working what has been given to me, and making the best of my efforts. I understand that, most of all, I will need patience. Second, I will need to be creative in how I teach the class, creating for my students exercises which are both adequate and interesting. These are the challenges before me, and I am ready to take them on...

I am also ready to take on Global Warming (I believe). Are you ready?

In Moments of Sickness

2007-10-25T10:10:00.000-07:00

The night before I came down with, what translation tells me, "stomach inflammation," I briefly witnessed a burial ceremony, which took place a building over from Lily's parents' home.

My understanding is that the complex in which Lily's parents currently inhabit is highly populated with elderly people, so it was no wonder that this had been the third ceremony I've seen since I've been in China. Not to be funny, but that would make it 1 death for each month that I've been in China... I'm wondering if counting down the days until I come back is really such a good idea...

The beautiful side to this is the juxtaposition that the apartment's small park serves (yeah, the very same park that I had mentioned previously in my blog). In the center of this park, there is a statue which shows a mother reaching out to her newborn, something which might indicate "youth," or, at the very least, "happiness."

During times of reflection, we begin to think more about our existence, where we're going, where we're headed in life, and what we've done along the way. But, I was just thinking about life's cycle, how we're born into something which has been in place since time immemorial. I'm not just talking about culture and history, but the earth and everything around it. God only knows - quite literally - where all this stuff came from, how long it has all been around, and the future of it.

Just like an old abandoned building that once housed many people, but is now just a backdrop for Tianjin's scenery, we too, like the leaves, grow and fall from the trees. More so, our structure becomes brittle and we begin to slightly crumble. I too felt this last Sunday, when my body took over me and began to operate me, rather than I it. First the headache, then the bizarre burping, followed by a loss of appetite. One thing led to another, and very soon I was in bed, receiving I.V. from "san yi," Lily's third oldest aunt. By no means was it a "near death" experience; rather, just another shock I felt within culture...

As it turns out, I.V., which rarely seems to be in use in America (I remember only using it maybe once or twice in my entire life), is administered fairly frequently to people in China. I only had the chills and threw up a few times, but these symptoms were enough to have me slightly bed-ridden. I was also told that anything "cold" was out of the question; a breeze, a bottle of water, a hand, a look.

In China, much like the rest of the world, it is bad practice to mix warm and cold food. Yet, in America, we do it all the time. You walk into a hamburger place and usually, with some fries and a big fat greasy one, you "wash your whistle" with some ice cold coke. But, attention to the stomach, more than just a bad chemistry experiment of hot and cold, is crucially important within Chinese concept.

As a result, the blanket was not to leave my stomach under any condition. "Gai beizi, gai beizi" (cover your stomach with a blanket) was what mama had to say when I was lying on the bed. Of crucial importance are also the feet. Both of these - the feet and the stomach - should be warm at all times. If they aren't, then you didn't learn anything in med school...

As strange as it sounds, some of the best moments come when you're sick. I remember the time when I had my wisdom teeth taken out... my mom and were with each other in the living room, watching some crappy movie... I think it was "behind enemy lines." However, this moment in time for me is like a wine stain in a porcelain-white shirt. I remember witnessing the time go by, as my mom and were just sitting there in that living room, living.

Much in the same way, mama baba and I saw the sun set, making its way across the world, to rise once again, above the land where my mother is buried.

The enjoying moment came, when I had realized that, not just I, but mama and baba too had their eyes glued to the television screen, watching the latest development in the escape of Michael Scofield and Lincoln Burrows! Yeah, "yue yu" (Prison Break) will surely have you begging for more.

I think these moments of sickness give us a chance to remember how fragile life is. No longer are you caught up in the fast paced lifestyle of making it to work, working the day, and constantly gripped with what your next move will be. No; you are slowed down; you are living for each minute as your body recovers and regains its full health. Not only are you reminded of how great it is to be healthy, but you are equally reminded of how great is to be alive.
I'll never forget my mom, just like I will never forget mama baba, nor any of you...

Love,
Mike

Illness, Age and Death

2007-10-23T22:28:00.000-07:00

No, no, no, you don't have to worry, I haven't become "emo." Actually, I have learned quite a bit about these three areas -- illness, age and death -- as it is understood with a Chinese frame of mind.

Last Friday, October 19th, was "lao ren jie," or "Old Person's Day" in China. On this day, many people will get together with their family members, especially with their elder members, and have some sort of meal and share a moment in time with each other; you know, pretty straight forward. At this point, I can't exactly remember what I did, step by step, that day. But, I do remember a few moments that might have led up to the illness that befell me on Sunday (I'm trying to sound like some old, ill-plagued Russian author here).

Okay, I remember now. Lily's dad and I began our morning with a jog in a nearby park. This was nice, because it gave Lily's dad and I one of our first man-to-man moments, where we were able to test our strengths and abilities. Actually, I just ended up jogging at a slightly faster pace than he, and it was a fairly laid back experience, with the park being filled with many "lao ren" (older people).

A bunch of old people like to chill out at the park, whether they're doing some form of "tai chi" (slow body movement), walking, or playing some kind of board game with each other. There was this one activity where everyone had a "sword" and they were practicing their upper-body movement with the sword.

This is a picture I took... on Saturday? It was taken in a nearby park area, found in the center of Lily's parents' neighborhood. Most living quarters have a small park, where you'll find trees, grass, benches and a lot of other stuff most people would have in their front lawn; except, this is everyone's "lawn."

I also learned one new exercise technique from Lily's dad. I found out that walking backwards (yeah, backwards) is actually a popular technique for many middle-aged/elder Chinese people. Lily's dad had told me that it is a good exercise for the lower back. After talking with Lily, I found out that Chinese people believe it is also a good mental exercise.

So, later that day, in the evening, we had one last visit to make -- to see nai nai, Lily's dads' mother. Like most Chinese people, nai nai quickly filled my hands with oranges and anything else edible in sight. Not wanting food to go to waste or to hurt anyone's feelings, I graciously accepted her fruit and we were on with our ways; we didn't stay too long, because it had already become late in the evening and Lily's dads' parents aren't so sociable. I mean, it's good enough to stop by, say "hi," and call it a day for some people.

Well, later that evening (I keep saying "evening" -- it was just one big blur in memory), my appetite got the best of me and I just had to bit into one of the oranges. Man, I have to say, that was one funky orange. I wasn't about to live on the wild side with this fruit, so I ditched the orange asap. However, the damage had been done (I'm laughing to myself right now).

No, I'm really not sure what led up to my stomach issues on Sunday (which is the next segment in my blog), but I have a feeling it was food-related. Maybe the orange, maybe a few hands that hadn't been washed in the process of making the food... I'm not really sure, but what I experienced on Sunday had snatched my appetite away from me for the last couple of days...

Summer Palace in Beijing

2007-10-16T05:40:00.000-07:00

Sorry for the lack of updates, everything has been going well for me on this side of the world.

My life in China at this point has sort of fallen into a routine. During the week, I am at the university, catching the bus in the morning to teach, or meandoring through the nearby neighborhood. It is in this area where my friend Yao owns a small shop. At this shop, many of the guys like to congregate and hang out. We usually go out for lunch together. If not that, we hang out in the front area and "shoot the shit."

However, I tried to change this up a little by making another trip to Beijing this past weekend. I met up with my friend Lu Kai Friday afternoon at some bus station near downtown Beijing.

I should start by introducing Lu Kai, or Lukey (as Lily likes to call him). Lu Kai is an old classmate of Lily's from high school whom I had the pleasure of meeting while Lily was in China back in August. We hit it off real quick when we first met; he bought my a beer, and then we all went downtown to a few clubs, where we shared more beer and laughs. From this point in time, I remembered Lu Kai to be a happy-go-lucky kidster, always laughing and cracking jokes. However, as is true for most people, you are only first introduced to one side of the story, to one component of a complex personality.

As it turned out, Lu Kai came off as one of the most caring, most mature persons I ever met. Every second we spent together in Beijing, he always looked after my well-being. He made sure that I was never tired, that I was never unhappy, and always did what he could to put a smile on my face. In short, Lu Kai really left an impact on me, one that has changed the way I would like to approach friendships in the future. More than that, Lu Kai gave me reason to further believe in a virtuous life. What I mean is, he always showed respect to elders -- Lily's aunt "da yi" -- he always had us going to bed early, and when tempted by "mistresses" of shi sha hai, he never wavered in his position.

Yeah, there's a place in Beijing called "shi sha hai." It's not a bad place; actually, it can be a very romantic spot, with many restaurants located right on the small lake. However, it also offers the "nightlife," where one can grab drinks in the bar, go dancing at the clubs, and even "call girls" for the desperate. With that said, no of this phased Lu Kai.

So, shi sha hai was Saturday night's activity. We didn't stay out too late for one minor inconvenience -- I left my passport back in Tianjin! Yeah, I made the high mistake of leaving the most important document back in another city. To be honest, it did not even cross my mind; I have become so used to living in China now, that it would be the same as me carrying my passport back in Austin.

Well, with a little bit of help from Lily's aunt, we made our hideout, like Anne Frank, in some nearby hotel. Yeah, I felt like some runaway fugitive, sneaking in and out of our hotel room. However, everything turned out to be fine after a few headaches and some thinking.

At this point, I do want to comment on some rather disappointing, yet real discrimination I finally encountered in China. When Lu Kai and I were trying to find a reasonably priced hotel in Beijing, we thought the "hu tong" would suffice. For some who don't know, Beijing has many hu tongs, which are really compacted neighborhoods that have streets big enough for pedestrians and people on bike. So, Lu Kai (I think I'm going to call him "Luke" from now on) and I perused some of the resting places one could find in the hu tong.

However, to our dismay, due to the fact that I am a "wei guo ren" -- a foreigner -- I was not allowed a place to stay. This was an interesting experience, because not only was it the first time I faced discrimination, I actually understood the Chinese coming out of the lady's mouth.

You know, sometimes it takes experience, or at least a few instances of some form of human behavior to, in the least bit, understand the circumstance of other people. I'm not trying to say that I am a completely changed man, that I finally fully understand racism and the plight of many non-whites; my encounter with discrimination was very minor. However, it did get a few cogs running in my head.

Back to Beijing and tourism, I was told by Lu Kai that we would be going to some "park" on Saturday. At this point, I was thinking, "of all places to see in Beijing, why the hell is Lu Kai taking me to some park??" Okay okay, time to practice a little patience and flexibility, I'm sure things will still turn out to be okay. I mean, at least I'm spending time with a nice guy.

As it turned out, some information was lost in translation. We weren't just going to some park. On the contrary, we were going to the Summer Palace! I soon realized this once I met up with Lily's cousin, Hu Miao.

First, here are the pictures I took: http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2343351&l=c3f63&id=7936253

I want to start by saying, of all the places I have seen in Beijing, the Summer Palace has, by far, been the most impressive. Located on a lake, the Summer Palace was once the home of China's kings and queens (at least during the Qing Dynasty). I am not sure how far back this historic place goes, but one can really feel like a "king" when taking a stroll along the lake and up the hillside.

On one side of the lake, one can walk in and around some of the finest architecture Beijing can offer to a tourist. The Chinese government has done a great job of restoring and preserving many of the relics the Summer Palace has on display for visitors. Speaking of visitors, although there were many, the number of people at the Summer Palace did not compare to the horde of people Lily and I saw at the Forbidden City.

Although I always encourage people to experience a place for themselves, I should warn you all not to have high hopes for the Forbidden City. Though the place is deeply rooted in history and has a background that overshadows any other historic landmark in Beijing, the place in modern times is just a deathtrap for tourists.

So, as always, the weather played its role in my experience at the Summer Palace. When we first began our adventure within the palace's walls, there was a foggy mist that hovered above the lake. It was very ideal for a moment of reflection and awe for nature's beauty. To me, it sort of reminded me of a romantic moment, when two lovers are taking a stroll along a lake with the weather's energy beckoning the lovers to slow down in time, and to just savor the moment. Well, I did my best with that description; you could also say it was like being "sleepless in Seattle."

Moreover, the weather had a second face. While cool and calm in the morning, the clouds broke and the sun soon shined down upon the lake and palace; it was truly a magestical moment, as if "God" or the kings of old were once again reigning down upon this sacred place...

For us though -- Luke, Hu Miao, and I -- we were just a bunch of frockling youngsters retracing the steps of China's high officials and various people of ancient royal status...

I hope you all enjoy the pictures I've posted! I have plenty more to say about China and I will keep the thoughts coming, one chance at a time.

Love,
Mike

Ethanol and American Politics

2007-10-11T06:05:00.000-07:00

I recently helped Lily with her government homework and found the articles somewhat interesting. She had to dicuss the impact of campaign contributions on Congressional behavior. In other words, how much does big business influence American politics?

This is interesting in that I have recently taken an interest in a fairly new television show called "Prison Break." I know I'm behind the times, but since I have had more time to watch television and movies, I have come to appreciate some areas of American pop culture that I before overlooked. For example, I recently watched "Minority Report" and found it to be a very interesting movie. In this movie, Steven Spielberg adapts one of Philip K. Dick's novels. As some of you know, Philip K. Dick has written many science-fiction novels which center around several common themes; these themes include technology, drug use, and paranoia towards government control. Of course, I am oversimplifying the complexity of some of Dick's works.

However, at this point, I think it is worth discussing the mechanisms of American politics, seeing as how the next presidential election is not too far off. Again, I find it intriguing that, without great effort, I find myself entrenched in a subject that greatly correlates with current events. In other words, I did not choose to look into politics at this point. Rather, it sort of just crept up on me.

Back to the point here, I read some interesting articles on ethanol and the motivations behind this "corn-based additive." Many people argue that this will come to replace gasoline, that it is more environmentally-friendly than our current energy sources. However, Lily had to read some articles which debunk this idea. In fact, these articles point out that, if anything, ethanol has the potential to produce in excess 25% more in greenhouse gas emissions than regular gasoline.

Looking at the matter more closely, it seems that in actuality, the ethanol industry has a strong grasp on the politicians' priorities. Back when Bob Dole was running for president, because he supported the ethanol initiative, he received $74,000 in campaign contributions. It is clear as day that, if you are in need of great money for your presidential campaign, you should think twice about shooting down ethanol as a potential option...

What I find more interesting, of course, is the television show that I have recently been watching. I must say, I am really hooked on "Prison Break." In fact, I can't wait to watch the next episode when I have the time and place. Without ruining the overall storyline, the main characters do encounter some larger problems, problems that involve the government and political corruption once it comes down to energy and profit. After all, America is an "energy-based economy," right?

Well, in any case, it will be interesting to see what course America takes in the next several decades to safeguard its power and economy. I just hope that many families will avoid catching fire of the political corruption that is soon to take place once things come down to the line; when peoples' wealth and power are at stake.

On another note, I will be heading back to Beijing tomorrow. I figure it is due time for another visit, because I haven't been back since August. I will be meeting up with one of Lily's friends, Lu kai. He's a really nice guy, we share many jokes together and share a similar sense of humor; so much so that we call each other "gemer," or "bro." I'm not sure what we'll do, but I'm sure we'll hit up some of the tourist hotspots and possible go out on the town at night.

For now, I'll leave with you this picture:

Isn't she beautiful? I miss Lily a lot, but thankfully, she will be coming back to China for Thanksgiving. In this time, we will be reunited again, and we all (as a family) will be able to eat together, enjoy one another's company, and all feel happy and warm. I want to say more about this, and I think I'll save it for next time. The conclusion is that family matters, and the more you become in love with your family, the more life becomes meaningful and worthwhile.

This I also learned from "Prison Break." Each character may seem dangerous, but in the end, they just want to be back at the same point with which we often take for granted. That is, they all want to be back with their families once again. After all, you don't know what you have until it is gone...

Love,

Mike

Action speaks louder than thoughts

2007-10-07T18:15:00.000-07:00

Not much can be said in the last few days. It has been quite relaxing since my return to Tianjin from Seoul. For the first few days back, the weather wasn't very encouraging with the continuous, albeit intermittent, rain. However, the rain did give me time to reflect, catch up on sleep and chill.

I slept quite a bit this past weekend, making up for some of the sleepless nights in Korea. Although I had only been in South Korea for just a week, I quickly got used to the college lifestyle once again; a lifestyle of going out late at night, drinking, not returning until the early morning, and just living a silly daydream.

I think part of me feels disappointed for having to leave so soon. Though China is hardly my turf, I have to admit that I have become accustomed to the city and the lifestyle already. With that said, Korea sort of brought me fresh air once again - quite literally - and I wasn't finished breathing.

That's when I got to thinking, what if I could make my way back again one day? Hell, why not just make it more than a simple visit? As Eileen and many others have said, I'm "young" and have a lot of time to explore myself, to explore the world and to learn more about life. I guess I'm trying to say that I've caught the "bug."

No, really, I'm thinking about making Korea my next destination once I've completed my year of teaching in China. And, I don't want to do it alone this time... *smiles* yeah, I want Lily to go with me this time around.

I know it won't be an easy goal to achieve, but since when have lofty goals been easy to reach? The biggest "obstacle" at this point is that she's a Chinese citizen, and I am not sure how the process works with non-American citizens. For the most part, Americans are gladly accepted into many countries and cultures. Of course, you would never know this according to what the news tells you at home. My time outside of America has highlighted some of the many freedoms we Americans take for granted.

I'm sure a lot of you know how dreamy I can be at times, neglecting to see the reality of things. But, for me, the best part of life is dreaming. Moreover, chasing that dream makes life worthwhile.

I'm thinking, walks on the beach, holding Lily's hand. Hikes into the mountains, where we can both get lost in nature. Perhaps we can make an occasional bullet train shot to Seoul, or a ferry trip or two to Japan. Japan is not the only place within one's grasp from Busan. At your feet, you've got Jeju Island - a supposed beautiful island of Korea - and at arm's length, you've got Lily's homeland, China.

The pay is also considerably better than what I am making in China. As a "developed" country, Korea's economy is on par with Japan and the US, making the Korean won fairly strong. Not only is this attractive, but Korea's relative position below the Japanese and US economy makes the cost of living in Korea lower. For example, you can get a 2 floor apartment loft for about US $450 a month. If you're lucky enough, the school for which you work will subsidize this expense. In a nutshell, those who go to Korea to teach English will leave with a nice sum in their pocket. After China, I’m not so sure how much I’ll be “worth.”

With all of that said, perhaps you can all appreciate the excitement I have for next year. Either way, I will be with Lily, whether in America, or someplace else in the world. However, to think that we could be setting sail down a highway that winds the mountains and overlooks the beach... I'm just in the sky right now with my thoughts...

As any man would do, the next step would be to consult the parents. Now, in America, it seems to be perfectly fine to voice one's opinions and ideas, whether they seem potential or otherwise. You know, you just talk out your ideas and have others contribute to the thought. Before I made the decision to go to China to teach, I had all the wise men sit at the table and discuss the issue - a few beers at Stone Werks with Valdo and Brian.

With this in mind, and my excitement at its peak, I thought I could discuss the idea of teaching in Busan with Lily's parents. Well, as it turned out, Lily's parents weren't so upset as much as Lily. Actually, Lily's father thought it was a really good idea, said I was smart, and Lily's mother also had a nod to give. I really did make all the pieces fit; location, pay, quality of life, it all fits nicely into my scheme.

However, I learned from Lily that thoughts are just thoughts, and one needs to have a sure understanding that the thought will become action before it is talked about before one's family. This, Lily told me, is another one of those unwritten rules, if not guidelines, in Chinese culture.

I admit, I have no idea if my plan will fly or sink to the bottom of the ocean. And, as Valdo once said, with which I agree, it's not so good to blow hot air; you should know what you're doing before you begin to tell others.

Right now though, my "hot air" is keeping me afloat in the sky and I haven't come down from it just yet. I thought China was a crazy idea, but it has turned out to be perfectly sound. My confidence is now creating another path in life for me to follow, but my maturity/experience needs to catch up.

Although I have seen some ugly sides to life, I have also been exposed to life's beauty and wonder.

The wonderful point here is that Lily and I give each other room for mistake and we learn from each other. The beautiful aspect of our differing cultural origins is that we are learning more about ourselves just as much as we are learning more about each other.

The next step for me is to grab Lily by the arm and take her on this ride before the dream is over...

Busan Reflections

2007-10-02T01:39:00.000-07:00

Today was a very nice and relaxing day. I've been told that you haven't "experienced" Korea until you have gone to a public bath. So, I took these words with heart and set out for the nearest public bath.

For some who are unfamiliar, public baths are places where Korean men strip down completely and chill out in pools of hot, jacuzzi-like, water. Well, today, I did just that, took the clothes off my back, and became "Korean" for a moment. Here's the view from the hot pool:

For 1000 won more, they will give you a customary outfit for public baths. They look something like this:

I spent the rest of this day relaxing at the spa, reading some of Josh's "Korea" travel book. It had some interesting tid-bits on North and South Korea; of course, I was more interested in North Korea.

There's something about a country which is still highly isolated in this day and age. The best the book could do in describing North Korea was to say that visiting Pyongyang (North Korea's main city) would be like going back to the Cold War communist days. That says a lot, considering that much of the Cold War ended in the late 80s, early 90s.

As the book would say, much of what we know about North Korea seems to be mostly rumor, and, as a result, it is hard to say what is "true" and what is "false." The truth remains that living standards are very minimal within North Korea, where everyone has highly limited freedom and low access to food and/or other resources.

The book also discussed the emergence of Kim Jung Il and the diplomatic relations North Korea has had with the US over the years. According to the book, Kim Jong Il came to power in 1997, after his father, Kim Sung Il, died of a massive heart attack in 1994. Interesting fact, Kim Sung Il is the world's longest ruler, even surpassing Elizabeth II. The sad part about Kim Sung Il's death was that his death occurred around a time in which Clinton was making strides in improving US diplomacy with North Korea; this involved disarmament in return for aid.

Late in Kim Jong Il's reign, efforts were once again made to improve diplomatic relations with South Korea and the US by inviting both figureheads to come and visit North Korea. However, by this time, Bush was flying words around, labeling various countries as an "axis of evil." No surprise, diplomacy with North Korea has since greatly suffered, with North Korea testing nuclear missiles last year. Not only that, but most North Koreans are fed anti-US propaganda as a result of this deterioration in diplomatic relations between the US and North Korea.

Of course, the political situation and the events which have led up to today are not quite simple, but I'm eager to talk more about some of the other experiences I've had so far in South Korea.

The day before my trip to the public bath, I and some of Josh's friends hiked Jangsan mountain, which is located to the north of Busan. For the sake of geography, Busan is in the southeast corner of South Korea -- clear across the country from Seoul -- and is right on the beach. Busan also has a mountain range to the north of the city. This really makes Busan a beautiful and lively city; if there isn't beach fun, you can always find yourself a hike.

So, I hiked on Monday up to the top of the mountain. It was fun hiking with Josh's friends; one of them had been teaching in Japan for 3 years. She had a lot to say in the way of Japanese relationships between men and women. She had mentioned marriage in Japan and said that it is largely seen as a "contract" between men and women. Once women become married, they soon evolve into the role of "mother" and quit their day jobs to raise the children. She also explained that women subsequently control the family's finances, and sex between a husband and wife is greatly strained; husbands do not believe in sexual intimacy with the "mother."

She also talked a bit about Japanese notions of "race" and what it means to be "Japanese." Her understanding is that, unless you are born in Japan, you'll never really be Japanese.

One conclusion that we all reached from our conversations with each other is that generalization is an easy, but dangerous mistake to make. Though she obviously knew something about Japan -- she lived there for 3 years -- and I know more about China at this point, we both still need to be mindful of diversity and differences within culture and society.

In other words, it isn't enough for me to simply say, "Chinese people are nice." Sure, some will be nice, but others will be bad. Likewise, for her to say that old Japanese men are rude and mean would be a gross generalization of Japan's elder population.

I think this is true, not just for people, but also for other aspects of a country. In the end, I just told her, "Don't listen to me. Experience China for yourself." That's really all I can say at this point, other than to share my own personal experiences.

I have not forgot to take things with a "grain of salt." Instead, I will remember what has been told, and then proceed to reach my own conclusions with well-needed research.

I had to point this out, because it's been bugging me a lot. Since being in South Korea, I have suddenly become a spokesperson of China for those who wish to visit the country. In some cases, I had to defend China in the face of criticism for those who have visited China

However, much like my situation with Japan and South Korea, these people only visited China for maybe a week. It's a bit of a stretch to say you know China after having been there only 1 week.

In my mind though, China still has to be my favorite place of the Asiatic countries I've visited. I admit, I am biased; China has become my second home. I really like China, and I can further say this after having spent time outside of the country once again. There is something there about the people and the culture which goes a lot further than just nice beaches and high technology; believe me, I was quite surprised by Korea's "bullet train," which went up to 300 km/hr!

Seoul Nightlife

2007-10-01T08:06:00.000-07:00

Hey everyone,

Sorry for the lack of update, I have been spending the last few days in Seoul and I recently traveled with Josh to Busan, where Josh is currently teaching.

Last I remember, I mentioned the events that took place Thursday night and Friday. Since I met up with Josh, we went to Hongjik University area, where you can find many bars and clubs. Friday night happened to be "Club Day," so they had a special $15 fee charge for all clubs; so, you could get admission into any club for a flat fee of $15. I really should have waited to drink and party hard for this night, but seeing as how I did so the night before, I was somewhat of a lamer Friday night with Josh.

No worries though, Josh is a very laid back and cool guy. We ended up sitting outside a club, chatting for a couple of hours. It was funny, because we both had a bottle of this rice wine which we hardly touched. In Korea, they call it "makali."

Next to that, we took a taxi that night to head to another area in Seoul called "Itaewon." On our way to this place, we sparked up a short conversation with the taxi driver.

Before I begin, I should say that taxis in Seoul are some of the nicest taxis I have ever rode. First off, the car has a built-in screen monitor which acts like a GPS system; Josh joked around and said it looked like an old version of "Grand Theft Auto." Second, the cushioning is all made of some kind of synthetic leather which is fairly comfortable. Quite a change of comfort, especially coming from taxis in Tianjin.

About taxi drivers in general, they are super crazy when it comes to the actual driving. Much like China, they don't seem to adhere to many of the road rules and will often pass red lights when there is no oncoming traffic; according to Josh, this is very common in South Korea. Josh said that once, a taxi driver even made a left turn on red! Yeah, pretty crazy.

Well, the taxi driver seemed willing enough to make friends with us, despite the great language barrier. First, he offered both of us Korean cigarettes, and then he made an interesting comment about Josh. He looks into his rear-view mirror, and says "Hali Pata." Huh? Oh! Josh looks like Harry Potter!
Haha, really though, this isn't the first time a Korean has said Josh looks like HP.

Next day (Saturday), Josh and I made it out to one of the many palaces in Seoul. He and I walked around and did more catching up. Josh mostly talked about his recent travels through Europe, and told me some of the places he recommends. Of these places are Austria, Germany, Czech, Hungary and Turkey. I'm already thinking of doing such a trip with Lily someday :)

One experience Josh tried in Europe was "running of the bulls" in Spain. According to Josh, this was something his friend Nick really wanted to do, and also something very frightening! He was telling me that there is no strategy other than: avoid getting hit by the bulls! Josh said that all he remembers was, in a flash, he saw the bulls up ahead of him, barely getting their horns on one guy.

So, later that afternoon/evening, we met up with one of my new friends in Seoul. Her name is Cathy and we met on the bus ride from the airport to my hostel. She was very nice and helpful. She told me that she studied in Australia for college and that she had recently visited her parents in Tianjin.

In any case, I told her that I'd love to see more of Seoul and eat some good food, so we arranged to hang out Saturday. With Josh, we all met up at Burger King and then took a taxi to some area near Seoul Tower. She took us to a place that was highly recommended. For good reason, the place seemed more traditional, where one could sit on the floor.

We had a bunch of food starting out with many samplers. One thing Koreans like to do for meals is have many small side dishes, consisting of kim chi, and other vegetables with different spices; there are also different meats and fish too. I wish I could remember the Korean names for these small side meals...

For the main course, we had bulgogi, panjeon -- which is some kind of pizza/pancake -- and some type of egg meal. It was all very delicious!

After dinner, we all made a long walk over to an area where we were able to take a cable car up to Seoul Tower. Seoul Tower was a lot of fun; it itself was very beautiful, but the tower also offered great views of the city. Apologies, but my camera did not come out with very good shots of the views we had from the tower. Really, you guys will just have to come out and visit when you get the chance ;)

One cool thing about Seoul Tower was that it had a circular walkway, where you could see all sides of Seoul. Much more, it also had different cities and countries listed on the glass, corresponding with the direction of these places. So, there was one place in Argentina which is about 19,000 km from Seoul Tower; pretty long.

Afterwards, we all walked back down, rather than hitching a ride on the cable car again. It was actually a wonderful opportunity, because the weather was really nice that evening. We all also got to talk more and share with each other our dreams and accomplishments. Cathy was telling me that her boss is Irish, so she has to speak in English every day for her job. When I asked her of her goal, she said she would like to be a good mother one day. I said I want to be a travel writer...

We landed in "Namdaemun" market after visiting the tower. This was a lot of fun, we saw tons of people and side shops along and in the middle of the street. One section also had a stage where people were performing, doing singing to performing dance routines. From one of the vendors, I ended up buying some cute bunny slippers for my tuzi (Lily) hehe ;)

Later that night, after we parted ways with Cathy, Josh and I went back out to Hongjik University area for a special night with George Acosta. It was perfect timing, because George Acosta -- a famous DJ from America -- happened to be performing that night in Seoul. What's more, he was playing on the opening night of a new club called "Blue Spirit."

It was an awesome night, because there weren't many people and the first two drinks were free! A couple of times I shook Acosta's hand and the rest was spent taking photos, watching Josh dance and filming part of the show. All in all, it was a very special evening, watching a popular Florida DJ play a lot of oldschool trance.

Well, there is more to tell, but I will save it for next blog!

Until then, here is a link to some of the pictures I have of Josh and I in Seoul: http://utexas.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2335460&l=8ef19&id=7936253

Love from Busan,
Mike

Can you see my "Seoul"?

2007-09-28T04:07:00.000-07:00

Anticipation arising, I am sitting in the "lobby" area of the guesthouse, waiting for Josh's arrival. A close friend, Josh and I first met my freshman year of college at UTSA. It was one fateful morning that he and I were sitting outside class, waiting for Psychology to begin. Josh made the first words, and the rest, as they say, is history...

So, I haven't seen Josh for more than 3 months. Before I left for China, he was globe-trotting around Europe. Once he got back, I left for China.

However, for the past month (like myself), Josh has been teaching English. Instead of China, Josh chose Korea and has been teaching in Pusan.

He should be arriving any moment now, having taken the KTX from Pusan to Seoul. I understand that this train ride is about 3 hours, which I will be doing Sunday evening.

Supposedly, you can take what is called a "beetle" (basically, a large ship) across the Japan Sea from South Korea to Japan (and vice versa); this is what Andrew did to get here. I've already told Lily that she and I will be doing this at one point in the future :)

In any case, I have had up and down moments so far in Seoul.

Today was a lot of fun, Andrew and I went out to the Nam Dae Mun market, where you can find clothes galore. The funnest, and also most frustrating, part of the market is bargaining with the street shop owners. As some of you know, many Asian countries, unlike the U.S., promote bargaining in their shops. I say "promote," because they first start out with an outrageous price, only to take advantage of the foreigner who has no experience with bargaining. After all, this is unheard of in America and most of Europe (I believe).

Andrew and I put our bargaining skills to the test. We were successful at bringing 18,000 won t-shirts down to 12,000; if you are wondering, 1000 won is about US $1. Andrew bought 35,000 won shades for 20,000. We did a bunch of bargaining for other items that turned out to be failures. I wanted to bring the price down of one necklace, but the guy was stubborn and intent on parting with the necklace for no less than 86,000 won. I find walking away and then coming back a strategy in bargaining. Usually, the desperate sellers will drop the prices quickly if they see a "sale" quickly being lost.

I also tried some Korean food, having ate only Western food up to this point. Normally, I would insist on trying native food, but I feel justified this time because I have been without donuts and hamburgers for quite a while!

Andrew and I ate "Panjeon" with some Kim Chi and other assorted foods. We also ate what some might call a pancake. It was very yummy, with some type of honey inside.

Last night wasn't quite so good. I hadn't drank myself silly in quite a while, so I thought it would be fun to go out and do some drinking. I tried a Korean drink called "soju." It's a nice hard drink, goes down well. Well, maybe a little too well...

I ended up drinking a bit too much, stumbling around the Itaweon district. After Andrew saw things were getting out of hand, he had a taxi take us back to the hostel. Really, not a good idea to continue drinking once you've hit your peak.

Well, Josh has just arrived! I gave him a couple of big hugs and now we're ready to head out!

Love,
Mike

"Guanxi"

2007-09-24T07:48:00.000-07:00

This evening brought great conversation between Lily's father and me. With the help of a Chinese-English dictionary, and my improving Chinese, we were able to discuss some interesting topics concerning business, China, and the future I hold with Lily.

If you all remember, I recently wrote a blog about our "golf experience," where I said that Lily's father and I had to act as "puppets" before his manager and manager's son. Well, that wasn't the best way of putting it -- in fact, I think it was quite presumptuous of me.

However, I was skimming the surface of something crucial in Chinese business and lifestyle; what Chinese people refer to as "guanxi" or (as a crude translation) "networking." It is not an easy topic for me to discuss, because I do not fully understand Chinese business and culture. However, I did learn great deal more about it through Lily's father, and the effects it has on Chinese people and decisions made.

For example, Lily's father explained to me that one of the sole reasons for his wanting Lily to study and later work in America is to avoid Chinese "guanxi." In rough translation, he was explaining to me that networking in China has a good and a bad side, whereas America is fairly decent with its networking effects; not really sure how to better explain it, but he said "Meiguo hao, Zhong guo ye hao, ye bu hao" (America good, China good and bad).

What prompted this discussion was my complaints of my supervisor, "Grace." It seems that anytime I have any dealings with Grace, it ends in frustration. For example, the visa fiasco; lack of internet and television in my room; contract dispute; and now, getting my passport in time to go to South Korea.

That's right, I'm scheduled to leave on Thursday -- September 27th -- and Grace has somehow pushed everything to the last moment on returning to me my passport. You see, they needed my passport to issue me a residence's permit. However, they were able to return to Sean -- the other American teacher -- his passport and paperwork almost two weeks ago! How was I somehow left out? Take that into account that I also gave Grace advanced notice that I would be leaving for South Korea during National Holiday Week, which is next week.

As you can see, I have been met with several bumps in the road. It was as if Lily's father could forsee this, prompting me to offer Grace "gifts." For example, tomorrow is "Mid Autumn Festival," where everyone in China gets together with their family to share "mooncake." Lily's father and mother gave me a coupon for free mooncake to give to Grace. Coincidence? I think not.

Lily's father, after I explained to him my frustrations, also offered to take Grace to the Great Wall when I come back from Korea! Really, all it took was for me to speak the word "guanxi" to Lily's father and everything clicked...

I brought up the golfing experience -- Lily's father nodded. I hinted at the gift and the gesture of taking Grace to the Great Wall -- bingo!

So, my presumptions aren't completely in the dark; they just need refinement. Moreover, it was nice to discuss business with Lily's father. He talked about stocks in Hong Kong, China and the US. He said that Hong Kong's stocks are steadily rising, whereas America is at a standstill and China is super fickle.

I was also happy to understand Lily's fathers' devotion to his daughter -- my Meng Ying. To be willing to be separated from his dauther for the sake of her future -- to give her something more than what China can offer -- is very beautiful. I only hope I can make such a sacrifice one day for my child (if it ever came down to).

It was also another moment in which Lily's father and I bonded. Not to get too ahead of myself, but I contemplated with him the thought of living and working in Hong Kong.

Hong Kong -- on the edge of tomorrow, yet already there.

If you think about it, Hong Kong is at the center of Asia, with Southeast Asia and China its neighbors, and Australia/New Zealand not so far away. Not to mention, Hong Kong is fairly clean and on par with America and Europe in its development. Any way, just a slight consideration.

I love you all very much, and think about you all in every step of the way. Every moment I live brings up the great memories I've had with you all. I really do hope that I have offered you some glimpse into what I've experienced. Or, at the very least, I have enticed you all to consider coming out and seeing me in China ;)

Trust me, communism is here, but it won't haunt you. Rather, you will be met with gracious people, great food, and a luxurious lifestyle that beats America in price any day.

Mike

World Cup Experience

2007-09-23T05:28:00.000-07:00

I apologize for the lack of updates. As of now, I am still without internet at home, so my only access is at Lily's parents, or at the "wang ba" (internet cafe).

So far, everything has been very fun and enjoying. I have been very fortunate to meet some really nice people, and my job couldn't be any easier. I am starting to catch on with what needs to be done in the classroom, and, when I'm not teaching, I'm exploring more of Tianjin.

My school was kind enough to offer us foreign teachers tickets to last night's women's World Cup. It just so happened that the US was playing England in last night's match, so I had the chance to cheer on my country and develop more American pride.

On our way to the stadium, Mr. and Mrs. Brown (the two surrounding Kathy in the middle) ran into a couple of Mrs. Brown's students (the guys on the far left). The guy in the far back is Ryan, a new teacher who hails from London. He seems like a fairly intelligent guy, and can share a lot with me in the way of English culture.

For example, he was telling me that, back home, he was captain of his university's football team. However, and correcting my initial assumption, university sports work a bit different in England. Different from America, it is not a natural progression to move on to professional sports from the university. Rather, university sports are more like small-town high school teams. Ryan was telling me that many football players are actually groomed at an early age. He said that one English team recently acquired a 7 year old from Australia! As you can see, sport regulations are a bit different in Europe.

I can already sense that he is not too fond of American culture; we talked about "football" (America - soccer, rest of the world - football), and he finds American football to be quite boring. We also talked about college life in America, which he "seems" to understand; I believe Ryan has watched one too many American teenager movies, haha.

Back to the game, the US and England played against each other in one of Tianjin's newest stadiums. Supposedly, they built the stadium in preparation for next year's Olympic Games, with some of the games being held in Tianjin. According to Brian, the stadium holds close to 60,000 people.

The announcer at the stadium said that last night's game had something like 29,000 people in attendance. It's hard to believe this figure -- look at the emptiness of the stadium; it gives you an idea of how enormous the place is!

They also had a colorful fountain in the front of the stadium.

So, the game started off England receiving the ball first.

Before that, they had an opening cermony, where they brought out flags and had the captains talk about "playing fair."
The first half of the game was somewhat boring, with both teams exchanging shots and passes. When I wasn't watching the game, I was observing this adorable little girl who was sitting in front of us.

Interestingly, I and some of the other foreign teachers weren't the only Americans at the game.

In the second half, the US overwhelmed England with good passing and manuevering. After scoring our first goal, the US quickly scored another two goals. In the end, the US shut out England to win by a score of 3-0.

We actually left a few minutes early, because the game had been pretty much decided by the third goal. It wasn't too much trouble finding a taxi and making it back home. I have found it fairly convenient to get around the city without my own car; thank god, because traffic in Tianjin (and I assume much of China) is a nightmare!

Once we got back, I decided to test my skills and went out to Tianjin's club district. Too bad everyone bailed out on me, because it was a lot of fun. Tianjin has this district -- Xia Wa Fang -- which is lined up with bars and clubs. Three preeminent clubs here are "Sugar," "Feeling," and "Babi Club." They were all pretty much the same -- flashy inside with very nice architecture and colors -- and the DJs played similar music. I thought the DJ at "Babi" was probably the best; I guess because he looked "cool" when he wasn't mixing, and the songs he played were entertaining.

Nothing too exciting that night, other than an overpriced Bud (30 yuan, which is crazy expensive in China!) and some practice at speaking Chinese with the taxi driver. He asked me the same questions: where are you from, how long are you here, what do you do, etc. He was a nice man all around.

Today was spent hanging out with some of my new friends (I will say more about them in the next blog) and working out. I bought a membership at this one nice gym in Ying Kou Dao. It's frustrating that my bad back doesn't allow me to lift, but I did run some. I think I'm going to make it a habit of running several times a week; after all, I want to lose the beer/Chinese food belly for when I see Lily baby again ;)

Here are two links to more pictures from the game, and pictures of my friends:

My friends: http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2332731&l=85543&id=7936253

World Cup game: http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2332729&l=3c63c&id=7936253

More to come from China and (fairly soon) South Korea!

Love,

Mike

Inside the Classroom

2007-09-17T05:39:00.000-07:00

Today was the start of my third week of teaching so far. It is hard to say how much progress I have made (if any), but I am continuously making changes in the way I teach and trying to learn from past mistakes.

The first two weeks consisted of introduction and an attempt at lecturing. I did not feel wholly confident that my students understood me last week, so I was motivated to switch up my approach.

My initial thought was that I could pick interesting topics -- such as New York City -- and have discussion with the students. As it turned out, they could barely respond to such questions as, "why is New York City an important place in America?"

I do not blame the students for this, because many of them are finance/economic majors who are only studying English on the side. This was what I learned from one of my students, as well as another student, who explained to me the hectic lifestyle of a college student. Jeez, I should know this, I had just lived the lifestyle not too long ago.

This led me to thinking more about the imbalance of spoken language. I should not overly assume that everyone knows how to speak English. Sometimes, I take this reality -- that most people do speak English -- for granted. It is almost as if, by default, everyone knows my language. Well, whereas I put pressure on Chinese people to speak my language, what about my own attempts?

Sure, I've made some progress in Chinese, but I have a long way to go. Until I can speak the language fluently, I will continue to appreciate the struggles of my students.

In any case, we talked about Thanksgiving in class today. I decided to work with the book today, which I had wanted to avoid. Thing is, a book can only teach you so much -- the rest comes from the bottom of the teacher's heart, if not the back of their head. What's more, the book they are using -- "Family Album USA" -- is a bit old-fashioned. The front cover shows people in 70s getup, and the conversations within the book are somewhat like screenplays for "The Andy Griffith Show." Haha, I'm only kidding, but the books are a bit outdated.

So, I had the students practice the conversation in the Thanksgiving section of the book, which is supposedly where they had left off at since before the summer. I think it worked -- we practiced saying words such as "ingredients" and "recipe." I am only concerned about the pace with which I should take in the class. Of course, the dialogue is ridiculously easy for me, so it is equally easy for me to assume that the students competely understand what we discuss. Any ideas on how quickly I should move along with the book?

Well, here are some pictures of where it all takes place:

The computers are really nice, except, the sound system fails every so often (and without good cause). Here's where the magic takes place:

Because there are compatibility issues with Powerpoint, I have been using Microsoft Word as my method of sharing notes/information with the students. As you can see, the students are able to view what I have displayed on the main computer. I think this works well, because the students seem to be stronger in their reading and writing; so, if I am speaking to fast, they have a frame of referrence.

In other news, National Holiday week is quickly approaching, which means that I will have about 10 days free. I have already bought a ticket to visit Josh in South Korea, so I am really excited about this! I did not get a chance to see Josh before I left for China, so I am greatly anticipating the one-on-one time he and I will share in Busan. Like me, he has jumped off the diving board into the deep end; only thing is, his board was a few feet higher than mine (he has no family in Korea). He seems to be doing really well, and he naturally adjusts quickly to his environment.

More to come on the Korea trip and everything else in between.

Love,

Mike

"You Scratch My Back with a Golf Club, I Scratch Yours"

2007-09-15T07:17:00.000-07:00

Thank you all for the wonderful email! The nice thing about the world today is that, even though we are separated by thousands of miles, we are still one click away.

That leads me into "homesickness." Peggy and Brian are right, I do have homesickness; I've got a lot of it. But, I embrace this, because it only reflects the love I have for my family, friends, and my country.

As some of you know, I haven't always shown a lot of patriotism, or "love" for my country, but China has actually made become closer to what I call "home." In China, I have been reverted back to some sort of child who is "learning the ropes" each day. I rely on people more than ever, trying to pick up on the subtle cultural cues, and making many mistakes along the way. Though I am quickly picking up the language, I am still struggling with the tones, which Chinese people can almost perfectly say with little effort in the way.

As they say in Anthropology, one consequence to come out of studying another culture is to learn more about your own. Indeed, I have not only come to better appreciation the US, but I have learned more about our culture and the way things work. I find myself explaining to Lily's father each step of the way what "is" and what "isn't" American.

"In America, we do not have such crazy traffic." "In America, Japanese cars are more expensive." But, it runs a little deeper than that. "Just like some Chinese people, many Americans do believe in dream interpretation." This I explained to Lily's father after telling him that Lily had a nightmare involving him :(

Although I haven't shared with Lily's father every cultural comparison I have made -- I wish this could be possible, but my Chinese is like a "lock" on my thoughts -- I have made many other observations to myself.

For example, today, Lily's father took me to a golf club, where we spent most of the day with Lily's fathers' ex-manager and son. Now, although my Chinese is as good as a 3 year old, my 22 year old mind can still pick up on body language and situational context. I made the guess that, much of what Lily's father was doing today was geared towards "networking."

Though the Chinese people clearly see this underlying motive, it is not as greatly vocalized or as "taboo" as it is in America. In fact, I believe it would be socially inappropriate/condemned in America for a worker to spend time with his ex-manager's son. At least, this is how I felt today -- a strong awkwardness, as if I were doing something "wrong."

However, I kept a smile on my face and played like a puppet alongside Lily's father. I mean, he's a great guy, and I would do anything to help him better enjoy his life, even if it meant playing the role of the "happy-go-lucky" American who can help an ex-manager's son improve his English.

Really, the manager's son was a nice kid and showed me respect when he could, but I could see from every corner the kid was a spoiled brat; in Chinese, this is "xiao huang di," or "little emperor." This has become a huge phenomenon in China -- for children to be spoiled -- due to the "one child" policy that limits families to only one child. What's a father and mother to do when they can only take care of one child?

Not only did Lily's father pick up the kid, but he fed the kid, played "big brother" with the kid, and cheered him on every time he swung at his golf balls. The kid's behavior towards his mother (the ex-manager) was more telltale; not to mention, he was telling me he has PS3, Xbox 360, and he's got his own set of golf clubs!

What I'm getting at is not so much the inferiority of Lily's father and I in this relationship, but the complexity of human relationships and behavior in general. In this case, we're not only dealing with a different cultural/historical realm -- Chinese culture -- but we are also dealing with a generation gap.

Sure, times have changed, but the way in which Lily's father handles his business affairs seems to still be fairly strong in China. From what I understand, Valdo says that this is also true in Brazil. That, you need to know the right people and pull the right strings for things to run more smoothly. Valdo can see a doctor the same day he requests one. I've got to wait maybe one or two weeks.

Although networking is also important in America, I do not feel it is conducted in the same way, or as important as it is elsewhere. It seems that your credentials (i.e. education and work experience) and skin color are the strongest determinants for landing a job with an American company. It's not so much how entertaining you can be to a boss' son, though it does certainly help.

I'm not really sure where we Americans picked up on this idea of "merit," or why we are so determined to enforce it. But, are we truly dealing with one's "merit," or social inequality? How can you measure merit when people don't start off from an equal beginning? Sally goes to a private school, John goes to an all-black school on the eastside. Both put in the same effort -- what should be "merit" -- but Sally ends up at Harvard, and John ends up as an auto mechanic.

I know I'm leaving out important details, but it is all just food for thought. The point is, China has encouraged me to reconsider my own values and the things in which I have greatly believed.

Haha, no worries, I'm not about to start stealing or vandalize a church building.

I just hope that I can remember much of this after the whole experience is said and done. It seems to be that humans are molded and shaped by the environment. Though we hang our hats on one hook and the hook molds the hat a certain way, when it is time to pick up the hat again, the mold/crease vanishes.

However, I do believe the hat is never exactly the same again. I wonder how much of me will be forever changed by this experience. We'll have to wait and see ;)

Wisdom and Love: The Great Struggle

2007-09-11T00:00:00.000-07:00

I am not sure where I am going in my life right now, but I know that I am going somewhere. Whether it’s sitting in the subway back to Cai Jing Da Xue (where I live) from Hong Hu Li, or catching the next plane to Hong Kong, I’m moving – always moving.

At the same time, thoughts continue to flow, feelings come and go, and decisions are made. The world doesn’t stop; you only go backwards in time. As time moves on, you begin to understand things before you, make the connections, and you are finally caught up to the present.

Yet, I am still trying to make sense of this life, the decisions I’ve made, the experiences I’ve encountered, and what’s to come in my future.

I try to take small and big strides, working with the wisdom that’s given to me, and what I know as of today. It’s hard to see past passion, pain and uncertainty, making your way to the end of wisdom’s path, but I am blindly going with it.

I’m “rolling with the punches,” as they say. Making the decision to leave my family, friends, and, most of all, my beautiful girlfriend behind was not an easy one. I am still not sure if it was a good decision, but each day does bring new delight and fascination.

However, regrets can’t be had, and one “crying over spilt milk” is an action people do not like – there just isn’t any sense in second-guessing decisions that have been made. You have to continue moving forward, taking each moment with pleasure and excitement.

Wisdom tells me that no decision is a bad one, because you always learn. You learn when you are sitting down with gracious people, eating various plates of delicious food. You learn when you feel lonely at night, without your companion. You learn when you speak the word for “shrimp” and people look at you dumbfounded – they think you’re saying “shoe.”

I am trying to see beyond the surface, believing that, with pain, comes pleasure. I am also trying to see the bigger picture and maintain a commitment to my goals. Of course, uncertainty is a demon which I must face and conquer. Though, do you really ever conquer uncertainty? This seems to be God’s sheath over our eyes, because only “he” knows what’s to come in your life. Or, does he?

I hesitate to answer this question, because I believe some force is driving our lives and all that is beautiful. Moreover, this force has reached an extreme capacity of pure love and devotion. It is such a beauty and miracle that we are given free will to decide, for ourselves, where we will go next in life. As Descartes once said, “this is God’s utmost and true love” for us. I want to believe this as I continue to make decisions and mistakes; that, any pain I suffer is a result of my actions, and that I am embracing a gift – life – that was given to me.

My goals are to live life passionately, experience pain and happiness, and examine these experiences and construct my own reality. I believe this is my purpose in life, to continue living and form various episodes that constitute my life. I believe we are all given this purpose, and we have to seize the opportunity with righteousness. If, however, you decide to do evil onto others, your life will not be meaningful.

It’s not a matter of defining “evil” and “good,” or wrestling with philosophical questions concerning ethics and morality. I know I am a product of American culture, but what I feel – as it pertains to my actions – seems to be natural. I feel good when I commit good for others; I feel bad when I mistreat people. These are the consequences of my actions, and they guide the decisions I make in life.

Of course, everything is relative, and the accomplishments I make in life have no grounds for comparison with other people. Not just accomplishments, but I also mean mistakes, decisions, and life trajectories – we are all on different courses in life and we have to make the best of what we have.

Fortunately, I have been given such a beautiful life, comprised of amazing and beautiful people. I love you all so much; I am nothing without you all. Each day, you all give me such warmth and love. You all take me by the hand and guide me through the wind.

I am you and you are me. I am the result of my beautiful mother – god, I miss her so much. Each day, I am living for her, continuing her life and spirit. I am in China for her. I am in Japan for her. I am interacting with people for her. I am accomplishing what I can for her. She is in me, and I am living life for her, making up the days that she should have had. But, you too, are all in me.

The decisions I make come from you all. As I said, I am nothing without your wisdom, love and advice. I continue to tread unknown territory, but I am not afraid. I am guided by your hand, and through the cracks, I rise. I know this, because through my mistakes and decisions, I am taken to another point in life.

Liz, you took me in as your own son and gave me new life when my mother had been taken away from me. The love and support you gave to my grandfather – who I deeply loved – has driven me to be the greatest person I can be. I hope that I may have the same level of compassion and love as you.

Brian – you have always lent me your wisdom and broadened my horizons. You are both a brother and a father to me. Man, I can’t even imagine where I would be without you… When I was a troublemaker, with no direction in life, you came and rescued me. I look up to you in every way, and the wisdom you give me is golden. Not a day goes by that I try to live in your steps.

Aunts Sandy, Peggy and Uncle Tommy – you have all shown me how to live life passionately. This passion comes from the beautiful families you all have, and the commitment you all have towards making life the most it can be. I have had such wonderful moments with you all, and I hope that my family will one day be as equally wonderful.

Tim and Cindy – you all have shown me the beauty behind love and happiness. Your children are beautiful, smart and amazing. The warmth and love in your household reminds me that life is so wonderful and worth living. Thank you for bringing me up as your own son and giving me positive guidance.

Tony and Alma – your family is equally beautiful. You both have great personality and a pure heart. I can never express the gratitude I have for having had the chance to meet you all. Your store is so beautiful, as well as the impact you make in peoples’ lives. I only hope that my actions will be as pure and gracious as yours. I miss you all so much, and pray for your store's success.

My friends – you all know me the best. Valdo, Vinnie, Derek, Josh, John, Kellie, Charlie, Doug, Aaron, Anthony, Steven, Marcus, Robert, Will, Rollins, Sofi, Ray, and many others – you all give me air and life. When I fly, it is from the wings you all give me. You have all made my life such a great experience, I would be so cold and empty without you all. When I am down, and the energy is absent, you all bring back to the top and renew my faith in life’s beauty.

As they say in Buddhism, the lotus rises through the mud, and, upon reaching the top, it is clean. When I find myself sinking, you all come to my aid and bring me back to the surface. I do remain adamant in believing that the decisions we make come from within us. Moreover, the suffering that we experience is greatly a result of our actions.

However, these actions come from intuition, which is a culmination of all that has been taught to us. I did not come to China on my own. I came here with you all. You all guided me here, and have allowed me room for growth. I will make mistakes, but in the end, it will be you all who will break my fall.

We are all a web of free thinkers, given the opportunity to make our decisions and experience in this beautiful life. Thankfully, this “web” will catch us when we fall hard. Maybe though, the web might break one day. But, as long as we continue to live life passionately, the web will be rebuilt and remain strong. The strength will come in experience and numbers.

I am meeting new people each day, extending and expanding the relationships I have with people. This has been one result of my going to China. I have met so many wonderful people that, I can’t help but think, I would never have met in America.

The most beautiful person that I have ever met in my life comes from this faraway land. She is both very intelligent and compassionate, amazing and life’s greatest gift. Whenever I see her in pictures, or in person, I forget all that is bad and evil in this world. She drives me to pursue my goals, she makes me want to be a better person, and she is the main reason I am in China.

Lily, words can’t express what you mean to me. You make me believe in God. I know I may be young, and immature, but what I feel for you is genuine. I haven’t entirely given into wisdom and what it has handed down to me.

Wisdom has told me to go to China. Love has told me to remain with you.

Rather, I am holding both wisdom’s “hand” as well as love’s “hand.” Like a moment in which peace has been made – imagine President Bush shaking hands with Muslims – both hands are warmly embracing each other.

You see, I have made both a part of me, and I am taking my life in a direction that will make this embracement everlasting. I am here, in your country, to learn your language and your culture. I have given up my chance to be with you this year, as well as with my friends and family, to reach the depths of your heart.

This decision was not easy, but I have accepted wisdom’s conditions for love and happiness.

Each day, I relive your past, as baba and mama bring me up in a Chinese world. I see the places you have seen, experience your childhood moments, and slowly become one with you.

Though we started out an ocean apart, our two worlds have become my reality.

I am solving the beast’s requirements to reach your “labyrinth.” I am struggling to learn the language, breathing in the dust and fumes that is China’s pollution, sitting in a car zipping through near-death traffic, and spending each day without you, so that I can be a better man to you.

This experience is as much for me as it is for you.

When I become closer to China, I become closer to you. Your parents have become my parents. Their friends have become my friends, and China’s beauty and problems have also become mine.

It may be hard to see this as a decision guided by love, but wisdom has not won me over entirely.

I will be waiting for you, with experience and maturity in hand. These will be the tears and smile I wear when I step off the plan to see you once again <3

Home Sweet Home

2007-09-07T08:37:00.000-07:00

"We're not in Kansas anymore," yet we still are. I have two married suite mates who come from the great state of Kansas. They, along with my friends Sean and Kathy, are here to stay and, along with me, call Tianjin their home. I did not have to look far to find my circle of support and comraderie -- it came to my doorstep.

I should explain a bit about each of these wonderful persons. First of all, they, like me, seem to be on a quest for something more. They all want to explore more in life, step outside their boundaries and broaden their horizons. They are ready for the risks and the rewards. Speaking of this, I was at a stall in the bathroom, where I read the following: "although the risks my be big, the beautiful reward will be your new perspective." This corresponded with a kitty trying to leap to another branch ^_^

The biggest leap so far has been from Kathy. She comes from the Phillipines; who would have thought Alma?? It is an interesting connection, because my former boss and Austin mom comes from the Phillipines. In any case, Kathy seems like a nice person. She still seems quite nervous and somewhat shy (don't blame her, she didn't know anyone in China before she left), but I will do my best to make her stay in China more comfortable. I feel that this might be my way of exercising the extreme gratitude I have towards Alma and Tony for the love and support they consistently gave me back in Austin.

(Filipino) Kathy's on the right:

Tom and Kathy (who is in the middle) are the Kansas couple and are a wonderful presence at the school. Tom is a very intelligent, soft spoken man who has a nice sense of humor; the other day, we were laughing at the lock of a window door being on the inside where no one could reach it (I'll take a picture of this one).

From what I understand, Tom is teaching MBA classes and has previously taught English in China. Kathy, his wife, is a very nice woman, sort of reminds me of Judy, Brian's mother-in-law. She is very respectful, has a willingness to learn new things and has already almost been like a mother to me. She was telling me that she and Tom have 4 grown children and are always willing to take in more kids; in fact, they hosted a Japanese girl for a year I believe. This is interesting, because the Japanese girl fell in love with an American. I found all this out when I had asked them for advice on my length of stay in China.

Allow me to explain. Don't get me wrong, China is great -- the people are wonderful, the food is delicious and my teaching job is a lot of fun. But, all of that can't erase the emptiness in my heart, my desire to see Lily again. I walk the streets, ride the subway, eat in restaurants, and experience new things without the person with whom I had spent my summer days. Lily has become a lot to me, she (and of course, Brian) is my traveling buddy, my companion, and I miss her a lot. I wonder if being here for another semester would be too much... this is what I had asked Tom and Kathy. And, not just that, but I believe I will have many opportunities to see China again with Lily. This has been a thought on my mind in the past week.

The last person in my guesthouse, but the one with whom I share a lot in common, is Sean. He's a funny guy, has very humorous mannerisms and can make me crack up in the middle of a sentence. In some ways, he almost reminds me of Bill Murray's character in "Lost in Translation." For Sean, China has been an intriguing experience to say the least. He has somewhat of a condescending approach towards Chinese, yet still saves room to be open-minded towards their habits. It's hard to say, never really know what he's thinking -- I guess that's what makes him interesting. Overall, he's a really smart guy (graduate from Vanderbilt) and like me, has a wandering spirit and adventuresome heart.

I think all of these people have made my stay thus far in China very pleasant. As always, it is elevated to another, more intimate level when I spend my days with mama and baba. I'm at their place now, and will be here until next Sunday.

I gave you the words last time, thought I'd provide the pictures. Enjoy!

Here's my room:

My homage to lao lao (American pappy and Chinese pappy):

This evening, Chinese lao lao was so cute! He reminds me a lot of pappy -- I miss grandpa a lot. I was thinking about the mornings when I'd wake up really early, and see him in the dining room, reading his bible. Good times :)

Outside the guesthouse:

Here's the school where I teach:

It's a bit different from what you'd normally see in China...

Here's a picture of the main campus, where I live (but do not teach):

Lastly, one of my favorite places where I love to eat!

I promise, more pictures on the way.

Always with love,

Mike

Unlocking The Teacher's Heart

2007-09-05T06:35:00.000-07:00

Hey everyone,

This past Monday was the beginning of my teaching career for Tianjin University of Finance and Economics. There is a lot to tell and express to you all, with an effort to unlock the emotions I have toward this new profession.

I could not sleep the night before, thinking about Lily, adjusting to the new bedroom environment and having the thought of standing in front of 50 students on my mind. I remember continuously tossing and turning, awaiting the minute that the clock would strike 6:00 AM. I knew that, at this time, Lily’s father would be calling me to wake me up in time for my bus ride to the new campus. It was as if the cell phone were staring me in the face, being my reminder that I will soon be a teacher.

The act of waking up the next morning at 6 AM did not come with as much difficulty as I expected, but sure, it would have been nice to sleep for just one more hour. I got out of bed and headed towards the bathroom to brush my teeth. The first challenge of the day hit me real quick, as the water from the faucet in my bathroom poured out murky brownish water. I told myself that I would not allow this to stop me in my tracks, that it is part of the experience, and that I would try to be more flexible.

Ok, I made it out to the bus on time. It was nice that I had a co-worker waiting for me at the bus stop. Her name is Qi, Hang (English name is “Kate”) and she turned out to be a very wonderful person my first day. She, along with another co-worker, walked me to my classroom, as well as to other areas on campus, such as the dormitory and the cafeteria. It was very pleasant being able to have her on the bus ride to the new campus, because I was able to learn a great deal about China and teaching English from her; not to mention, her English is very good, and I finally had someone other than Sean with whom to speak English.

So, the bus ride to my new campus was an experience in itself. Many different faces passed my view as I sat on the bus, awaiting my arrival to the school where I would be teaching. I also got to see another side of China, escaping Tianjin’s circumference and entering a more rural area of China. This is interesting, because the campus is in a district still considered part of Tianjin. I am not sure how true this is, because Kate told me that the campus is between Beijing and Tianjin.

The rural area is much different than the city, and brought me some relief. For one of the rare times, I had the chance to see many trees and grassland, along with a blue sky. As Kate said, the air is much cleaner where the new campus is located. I knew that with some minor inconveniences would come nice delights. After all, I’m just a recent graduate teaching my language for the first time. I’m already thinking about some of the challenges which came up my first day of teaching.

As we approached the campus, my surroundings became very familiar. I felt as if I took one step back and found myself in Texas once again. Green, trees, clear big sky, and… houses! That’s right, there is this subdivision which I believe my bus/van will be passing each day as I travel to campus.

The houses are fairly large, even for American standard, and are encircled by something similar to a moat. Kate told me that she heard from a friend that these houses are somewhat like a condo “get-away,” which can be rented per day. Not sure how extended the truth was in this statement, but Kate said that some of the houses rent for 10,000 yuan a day. So, a rough exchange would make that about US $1,500 a day.

After about an hour and 30 minutes, I finally arrived at the campus. It is actually very nice on the outside, the buildings look very new and are all painted similar to the red of a tomato. I will provide a picture soon, but in word, these buildings are all painted this red and look identical! I have a feeling that I will get lost at least once my first month.

The time I got to campus was about 8:30 am, and the time my first class began was at 10:15 am. Believe me, the amount of time between went by faster than lao lao’s Chinese. When the time came, Kate escorted me, along with the “deputy director” (not sure what this title would be considered in America), to my classroom. The director is a very nice man, his English is better than my Chinese, and he seemed overtly concerned about my well-being.

I have to tell you, walking to my classroom building, and entering the building was like walking on red carpet to the Oscar’s. Not only was I escorted by two Chinese people, but all heads turned and all eyes were on me. I knew it was time to go to work, to begin the day that I would try to make a difference in students’ lives.

I soon stepped into my classroom, wearing blue jeans and my “Bruce Lee is my homeboy” t-shirt, and I made my first eye contact with the 45 students I would be teaching that morning.

From the very beginning, there were some technical difficulties, but it was all soon resolved. Actually, I think that some American schools would be impressed by the technology I have in my classroom; I think you’d like Brian. It’s really cool, at the front of the classroom, I have a desk and access to the main computer.

On this computer, I have a program called “net class.” Once I click on this program, and open it, whatever I decide to do on the computer can be seen on all of the computer screens which are in front of the students. That’s right, each desk has built in computer screens, which are somewhat slanted for the students to see; Alma, it’s exactly similar to how you have your computer screen positioned at the store.

Once I entered the classroom, very shortly, I made my first words to the students. I wonder how long it had been since they had last heard a native English speaker…

I never felt a moment of nervousness throughout the first class. I could not only see, but I could feel the awe that came from my students. It was as if I were some high profile celebrity giving them all a speech like some kind of publicity stunt. However, I believe my words carried far more substance, as I slowly spoke to them some of the thoughts running through my mind.

I did well to keep the class lively, never failed to say or do something. I spent a fair amount of time talking about English, the goal of the class, what will need to be done to achieve the goal, and a little bit about me. Actually, I talked a lot about me, but in a very subtle way.

Thing is, many academics always debate as to whether teaching could ever be done from an objective stance. I finally felt the pressure of teaching, wanting to make sense to these students, but also wanting to give them enough so they could begin to shape their own realities. However, I turned my interests into topics which I discussed, explaining to them different styles of music I enjoy. Charlie, I actually talked about Sasha and Digweed for a few minutes, knowing with complete certainty that they had no idea who these two DJs were.

This did not turn out to be too much of a problem, because I could feel their eyes glued to me. I could sense that what I had to say was of some interest to them, that I had become a new presence in their lives.

Really though, I’m not trying to paint some arrogant picture of myself; I would later find out in the questions I had them answer (“what did you learn in class?”) that they enjoyed what I had to say.

I have this feeling that classroom life in China is somewhat lifeless and that I had just become a breath of fresh air for the students. This had been explained to me previously by Liu lao shi, who suggested that I try to keep the class lively.

I did my best at this, walking around, keeping a smile, making hand gestures, and not ever allowing for a dull moment. I even played them various music, ranging from Coldplay to Marvin Gaye. These artists are as foreign to them as Beijing opera is to Americans. This world, though it has shrunk from air travel, is still very wide and full of great imagination and interpretation.

I couldn’t help but feel that this class might serve as a gateway to some of the students’ many dreams. As has always been the case, America is a faraway land, something like an enchanted paradise, which is fed to outside people in bits through film and music. However, for places like China, access to American culture below the media surface is somewhat hard to come by; Chinese people have lesser opportunity to hear Motown than they do Backstreet Boys.

The sad reality though is that any exposure these students have with America will only remain within the movies and music they enjoy. As I have learned from many people, traveling is very expensive for Chinese people, especially for traveling to America.

This hit me hard, as I thought of ways to motivate the students to learn English. One thought I had was to show them beautiful pictures of various English speaking countries; of course, the first country which came to mind was New Zealand. I thought that I could explain that, with better English, they could greatly enjoy traveling to these places.

I wonder if this would be more of a tease than an effective strategy, because many of these students may never have the opportunity to leave their country.

I don’t want to invoke pity, or create a dismal situation that these students possess, but I do feel that their opportunities are greatly limited in comparison to Americans. We often take for granted our ability to go to places like Europe, Mexico, Canada, and/or South America.

And, even for those Americans who don’t have such an opportunity to travel, you are still provided with a fairly good education and chance to find good work.

The reality is that wealth is greatly concentrated in few Chinese hands, and most Chinese people on average have lesser opportunity; opportunity being a good education, a chance to travel, a chance to explore life’s limits.

As for education, I wonder how good it actually is in China. Sean, the other American teacher, and I already have our handful of complaints. These complaints range from lack of textbooks, assigned textbooks which are incorrect, lack of promptness in knowing our schedules, and overall lack of organization. For Sean, he will be having his entire schedule changed next month, losing a couple of classes, and picking up “mixed” classes. So much for student rapport…

Not to mention, they come to a person like me – with zero experience in teaching – to teach 6 crowded classrooms. From my understanding, language acquisition is best achieved in a small classroom setting. However, the reality in China – according to Kate – is that classrooms are never small. China’s population can’t afford to have an ideal classroom size of maybe 25 for teaching a language.

These are my challenges for the year: to work under China’s educational reality, and to be a moment of enjoyment for my students.

My students are very wonderful. They are very courteous, intelligent, shy and sweet, and overall, have a genuine interest in me. I am coming to develop a teacher’s heart, wanting to tap into these students, and also wanting to share with them my reality.

I have told Lily this: that, as each day goes by without her, my heart rips a little more. My students have already pulled out the thread, and are sewing in the stitches to put my heart back together once more. I believe that the suffering I am causing for both Lily and I can be channeled into bringing enjoyment to my students.

As I said, maybe they may never have a chance to go to America, but I can make that reality come true, if at least in a rural remote part of China. I want to give them so much joy and happiness. I want to share with them my childhood, share with them the experiences I have been fortunate to have, and walk away having touched their hearts. If not all this, I hope that I will at least encourage them to continue learning a language that colonialism and history have made important.

I thought about this ambitious goal as I sat on the van headed back into the city. The sun had come close to finishing its descent over the hills, and you could begin to feel dusk over the farmland around. In this moment, I read to myself the various short sentences my students wrote in English.

“I hope that I can learn more about your country.”

“What are Americans like? How do American teenagers spend their free time?”

One student even wrote down that he hopes I can join his server on World of Warcraft! (For those of you who do not know, WOW – as it is called by many fans – is an online role-playing game)

“I want to be able to study abroad.”

“I think you are a wonderful teacher, and I hope we can be friends.”

I tried to remember all the faces I saw this day, wanting to attach a voice and smile to these sentences. The one face that kept reappearing in my head though was that of this one girl who didn’t look too far off from Lily. She had sat in the front row of my first class, and had her eyes focused on me most of the time. More importantly, I couldn’t help but think that Lily could have been that girl, sitting before me.

Lily (along with her parents, family and friends) has made me realized how special Chinese people can be, and given their life situation, I want to do so much for my students. I want to give them so much. I will ride on the bus for an hour, be away from my country, family and friends, if I can at least be a moment of enjoyment for my students.

I believe I finally understand the beauty of teaching.

"Time Goes By"

2007-09-01T08:18:00.000-07:00

Wow, I can't believe that I have already been away from my country for a month. This is the longest that I have been away from American soil, I truly miss the grass, trees and air in Austin.

With a month having already passed, I am about to begin my classes. I will begin teaching next Monday, and the next class day will be Wednesday. My schedule for the most part is very nice, I only teach on Monday and Wednesday. However, these days will be fairly long, with my day beginning at 7 AM and not ending until about 6 PM.

What I have been told is that a bus will pick me up at 7 AM from the campus where I live, and it will take about an hour to get to the campus where I will be teaching. I meant to blog about this sooner -- I actually had one blog titled "patience," which I haven't posted yet -- but I didn't find out until the day I met my supervisor that I would be teaching at a different campus.

It turns out that there had been quite a bit of miscommunication between Cultural Embrace (my "agency") and the university's agency in China. I was informed at the beginning that I would teach at the other campus (one which is separate from where I live), but then Cultural Embrace told me that the university was, in fact, able to find me a position on the campus where I live. This ended up being the contract I signed, which was signed back in June. I find it interesting that the university failed to notice this -- they had two months to catch this mistake in the contract -- and told me that the first job offer was the actual offer; the one which would have me teach at another campus.

Now that I attempted to clear up the confusion, the campus where I will teach is about an hour away. So, I will be picked up at 7 AM, get to the campus at 8 AM and wait around until 10:15 AM for my first class. My next class is at 2:15, and finally, my last class on Monday is at 4 PM. I think the bus will pick me up around 5:45 PM.

Wednesday will be pretty much the same schedule, except that I will have about a 4 hour break in between my morning and afternoon classes. I think during this time I will try to study Chinese, mess around online, and/or try to play basketball with my students/other students.

It seems like a great setup, I only teach two days during the week, and the classes are going to be very flexible. I met with my other supervisor, Liu lao shi (liu "teacher"), who was a very nice man. He is equally impressive, having been a diplomat, businessman in San Francisco, and achieving other accolades. His English was great -- maybe even better than Lily's -- and his smile made me at ease; overall, he made a great impression on me.

He said that I can teach my classes any way I like, going as slow or fast as I want with the book. I am also free to use multi-media, such as videos and pictures, as well as other resources of which I can think. I'm really excited! I think I'm going to start out my class by introducing myself in both Chinese and English. I will tell them about my travels, where I come from, my hobbies, and other stuff. I thought I could also play them some music I like, show them pictures of English speaking countries (haha, especially New Zealand!), and do whatever I can to encourage them from the beginning to practice their English.

As it turns out, Liu lao shi informed me that they are quite proficient in reading and writing their English, but they have little to no practice in conversational English. Liu explained to me that the Chinese education system had always greatly emphasized reading and writing, and that the education system has recently revamped its priorities in teaching English. The system believes it is more important now to emphasize conversational English. However, according to Liu lao shi, this change has been a very slow process. Furthermore, the teaching method has not been so great, discouraging many Chinese students from wanting to learn English; as Liu lao shi put it, "it is not the students' fault, but more the system." There is something about that statement that ringed in me, I saw a lot of wisdom in Liu lao shi after that point.

In any case, Liu lao shi wants me to make the class lively, do whatever I can to make it enjoying and give the students a great time. As far as grading, I will be responsible, but I can give as much or as little of quizzes/exams that I want. Learning from Brian's burden, I don't think I will be giving out many exams. I have thought that I will test them daily (maybe before class) on their listening and oral skills, by having them recite several phrases, or maintain a simple conversation with me. I am not going to actually grade them at first; I think that, if I don't see any motivation in them in the beginning, I may begin to grade.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think if I provide them with a pleasant atmosphere, allow them to enjoy the class, and remind them of the importance of English -- by showing them fun American movies and playing good English music -- that they will be motivated regardless of grades. That isn't to say they won't have any grades at all. In fact, they will have a final exam, which will be made up and administered by me. Liu lao shi suggested that I wait to create this exam, that I can discuss it with the class in the last few weeks of the semester.

Well, I am open to any input on how I should go about teaching this course. I just want to make this a great experience for my students. I think that they have been drilled so much in their Chinese schooling, I want to be the cool laid-backed American teacher that makes them fall in love with English. In much the same way, I want to have a similar relationship with them that I have with Lily's parents. Let me explain, I feel that Lily's parents are first nice and overwhelmingly helpful and concerned. As a result, it changes your attitude and makes you want to help at any moment, be considerate in any situation, and be the greatest person you can be. It's kind of like the idea that, if you give up your weapons, than maybe other countries will become less belligerent.

I know I'm delving too far and probably don't make sense at this point, but I want to give them so much freedom that my students will begin to enforce their own rules. Of course, if these "rules" are absurd, I'll step in and take the class in a different direction, but I want to trust them and believe that they are very capable of facilitating their own learning. It's a lofty, and probably idealistic goal, but I will quickly learn.

On to other topics, I finally had the chance to see my room for the year. It is truly nice! The university did an excellent job of setting up us foreign teachers. I will provide pictures soon, but for a description now:

My room has been the first room I have seen in China to have carpeting. I have a bed, a desk, a beside table with a lamp, and two large dressers. All of the furniture appears to be brand new. I also have A/C, and my own bathroom (which is very large!). Across from my bed, which is located in the center, is a wall made mostly of window; I have a view of the subway and underlying neighborhood.

Baba, along with Wu Xiao Fan (a friend of the family and a great guy), helped me to move in my bicycle, as well as my luggage. I haven't actually set up my room yet, because I came back home with mama and baba for the weekend. Like I said before, I want to make it a habit of spending the weekend with them; I love them a lot already.

I am very excited for mama and baba's new apartment, which will be ready in about 50 days (what baba and mama told me). Today, I went with them to a mall, where they picked out a very nice refrigerator and washer. A quick note; in China, when people get apartments, they almost always own the apartment, and when they purchase the apartment, it comes without appliances. You have to buy flooring, toilets and sinks, a kitchen counter, a stove, etc.

As I said, mama and baba got a refrigerator and washer. It touched me deeply that they wanted my opinion as to what I thought they should purchase. Baba said that, along with mama, my decision mattered. Imagine, a 22 year old, who has little experience, is asked to help make a decision in spending close to 7000 yuan (about $1000). Baba said that their new apartment will also be my apartment, and that, "ni bu gao xing, women bu gao xing" (translated: "you are not happy, we are not happy"). Wow...

Following this, I became a little concerned once, after my becoming excited over how beautiful one refrigerator was, mama and baba decided that they would want to buy it. I mean, it's a nice refrigerator, but I couldn't help but think I greatly influenced them.

Baba and mama quickly picked up on my concern, and I explained to them Lily's concern. I told them that Lily is very concerned about the expense of her schooling at UT (mind you, she's paying international tuition) and that we (Lily and me) don't want mama and baba to struggle financially; I actually didn't make such a complex statement in Chinese to them, but made it to that extent. Rest assured, mama and baba told me not to worry, that they are okay. They also said something which came across as, "we will help you financially too," but my understanding was poor; I sort of left it at that and didn't attempt to better understand it (to save baba and mama the frustration of finding words to explain it to me).

Although I want time to go by, so that I can once again be with my baby, once again be able to see my friends and family, I can't help but feel that I have already created a family here in China.

One song that I have come to greatly enjoy is a song by Zhou Hua Jian. The name of the song is "Time," and it is about time passing. It is a track on baba's CD of Zhou Hua Jian, and it really touched my ear like no other. The "timing" couldn't have been more appropiate, with Lily, me, mama and baba heading to Beijing the day before Lily's departure. Baba even picked up on this connection and asked (through Lily's translation) if that was why I had enjoyed the song so much. I later found out from Lily that the lyrics imply that, "time goes by, I don't want this to end."

In a way, it was fitting not only for the moment in which Lily was in China with me. It has also been fitting for the friends I have already made in China, the great food I have ate, and the many places I have seen. I don't want it to end, but then again, I didn't want my time with Lily to end either. I will be excited to head back to America one day soon, but I am also excited to make more friends, and make Tianjin more of a home.

"Time goes by..."
Here's a link to the song:
https://webspace.utexas.edu/msb64/02%20TIME.mp3?uniq=-cmxvsi

"Wo xiang liu xia lai..."

Love,
Mike

Saying Goodbye... Can be Beautiful

2007-08-30T07:18:00.000-07:00

Today was inevitable and a point in my journey which I needed to complete. Lily left this morning to head back to America. So many thoughts, so many emotions have been going through me all day today. I can't even begin to explain much of what I felt this morning, as well as throughout the day.

Overall, I have felt very empty inside, as if my best friend has left me for a long period of time. I look to the side of me in the back seat and see an empty spot. Everything is silent in the car, broken only by my simple Chinese. There's an empty 4th seat at the dinner table whereever mama, baba and I eat. Family and friends, this has already proven to be very very hard.

It seems that every other thought is about Lily. I miss her smile, her hugs, her smell, everything about her I really miss already. It seems like the whole time, both baba and I were strong, knowing that this day would come... when Lily would have to leave us. Despite our strength, we both had our fill of tears. I only needed to look at Lily's face the night before, and I felt a deep sadness; man, this is going to be really hard, I continue to tell myself. And, not just for me, but for Lily's parents as well.

It tore me up earlier today at the airport, when, as Lily was getting ready to go through customs, baba began to cry. They both hugged each other, both cried, it was very beautiful.

However, I believe we will all be together once again -- these are baba's words. I continue to look up to Lily's parents for strength. My god, how do they do it? Every year, they have to say goodbye to their baby girl (the only child for that matter). Each goodbye is almost worth a year, and at one point, it was worth 2 years, in which Lily did not see her family.

It isn't only just hard for Lily's parents, but for lao lao too ("lao lao" is grandmother). When I saw her this evening, she was very depressed. Part of this is because she did not get to see Lily one last time before Lily left. I hate to mention this, but I will never understand why Lily's parents insisted on heading to Beijing without first seeing Lily's grandparents one last time. One important thing that Brian has taught me is that family is very important, always make time for them, because you never know when that time will come again; I saw Granny this past July, she passed away later that month...

Who knows when lao lao and lao ye ("grandpa") will be able to see Lily once more. However, I did my best this evening, hugging both of them and trying to cheer them up. I told lao lao "bie ku," which means, "don't cry." I also told her that Meng, Ying (Lily's Chinese name) will be coming back home very soon, and that Lily loves her a lot; I also added that I love lao lao. I will continue to give lao lao as many hugs as I can!

Not just lao lao, but I will continue to love lao ye, mama, baba, da yi (eldest aunt), san yi (third aunt), ar yi (second aunt), baba's parents, and the rest of Lily's family. This time, they won't have to suffer as much with Lily being gone, because I will be a son to them. In fact, this early evening, I rode my new bike outside lao lao's apartment for them all to see, even gemener! If you don't remember, gemener is the neighbor whom I call my "bro." He's so awesome, he gave me bing qi ling ("ice cream") for free when I showed up today at lao lao's

It already feels like a very beautiful relationship I have with Lily's family, especially with her parents. Today was our first day in which we had to communicate with each other without Lily. Suprisingly, we made a lot of general conversation. I said things like, "Lily likes this," "Thank you mom and dad," "I like this," "I miss Lily," "I told Lily's friend, Camay, to take care of Lily while Lily is gone." We all shared laughs, and ate food together. In fact, after dinner this evening, they took me for a walk around Lily's neighborhood.

We passed all the neighborhood people on the streets, who were selling random goods, whether it be a necklace or some kind of clothing. We also watched people write calligraphy into the street, using water on a brush. This was very enjoying, to see people get such enjoyment out of water and a street; it was beautiful.

Baba and mama have also done a great job of teaching me Chinese any time they have the opportunity; I also have been teaching them English as well. As I said before, they are very humble people, and will not admit to their abilities in English. It has also been very touching that they have told anyone and everyone that I am their "son." "Ta shi wo de ir ze" ("He is my son"). In fact, this evening (before our walk), we went to this one place to eat. As usual, I get stares and people seem to have interest in me. Naturally, they ask Lily's parents about me. There is no lie, they tell them I am their son. In response, the people say "zhen de??," which means "really??" No explanation, baba and mama just nod their heads, implying "yes."

Around this same time, we also passed a game on the street, whereby you are supposed to toss rings on several rows of items; these items range from pottery to ash trays. Both baba and I tried our hand at the game. Baba almost got a tray his first try; he, unfortunately, didn't end up with anything. However, I gave it a shot, and after several failures, I finally landed the ring on a ceramic container; I told baba and mama right away that I would give it to Meng Ying :)

In no way do I want to imply that everything is all happy and nice without Lily, but the beauty does lie in saying goodbye. We all come to realize how much we love one another when we are faced with "goodbye." In some ways, seeing a person off for a year, who will be going to another country, is like saying goodbye forever; this feeling, at least, is temporary. But, we know we will see the person again. Our love, though, -- the beautiful part -- comes out in our tears. Lao lao really loves Lily, mama and baba love her to death, as do I. We all shared tears with one another; it was very beautiful.

As I have said before, this was one reason I went through with my decision. I needed to know how much I would miss my family and friends. I feel that I had become too comfortable, seeing my friends freely, and not giving enough effort to see my family in Texas. I apologize Aunt Sandy and Peggy, Uncle Tommy, Liz, Tim and Cindy -- I realize how important you all are in my life now. One thing China has made me realize is that family is very important. My missing you all has reminded me of how beautiful my relationship is with you all.

And, not just with my family, I needed to know how much I love Lily. I do not believe it is premature to say, but I feel already that my love for her is true. I will wait for her -- take everyone's advice that "if it is meant to be, it will be." I will continue to work hard at learning Chinese, so I can one day talk to she and her family in Chinese. I will also continue to see her parents every week, and help them out with their new apartment. This will all be very exciting, I will continue to grow in my Chinese and in my relationship with Lily's parents. I will also be able to see the new apartment before the end of the year!

Hang in there Lily tuzi, I will be strong for you, and I will keep your family's heart happy until you come back home! We will grow together, and we will cheer you on for your last semester! Once you have accomplished it, we will cross our fingers for you finding a great new job ^_^

Well, time to go to bed soon, baba mama and I will be going to my university tomorrow. I will finally be able to find out my teaching schedule for next week, and I will possibly also be able to see the campus where I will be teaching. Classes start next Monday, I'm nervous, but I believe I will do well!

Love,

Mike

PS Sorry for my lack of promptness in responding to emails, I will work hard at responding much sooner!

Hong Kong Departure, Other Reflections

2007-08-26T08:03:00.000-07:00

I'm waiting downstairs of the Mirador Mansion, sitting next to a Hong Kong-nese woman who is reading the daily paper. We're both in front of her stand, where she is selling a variety of shirts and garments for the many passersby. Again, reminded that I'm in Hong Kong as I see a sleuth of different people, ranging from Malaysian, to Indian, to European, and to Chinese.

I have the same feeling I once possessed the day I left Japan. Although I'm ready to head back to China and begin a new life which has been put on hold, I can't help but feel sad that I'm leaving another part of the world which had been my temporary home.

Well, such is life. As Marc said, change is good. In all honesty, I have sort of been on “the run,” without a permanent home for quite some time. I went from living on campus, to living with Grandpa and Liz (my last "real" home) to having two different apartments in Austin. It has been both good and bad; I can enjoy temporarily living in a place, and when things get bad, I know it won't be for long.

But, the last time I moved out (this past month), I realized that we all need a permanent home. It's rough having to move things out every year; especially being American, we have so much junk. Lily and I realized how many boxes of papers and old mementos we had, which we only look at the day we move out.

The person I do miss the most is my mom though. I thought about her in Hong Kong, and could have sworn I heard her call me at one point on the train. I joked with Lily about that saying adults tell children when a person passes away; that, this person has "gone on vacation" for a long time. I wonder if my mom has been on vacation for several years in Hong Kong. On the other hand, I want to believe that she is always with me in spirit... I believe this.

Fast forward a day later, I'm back in Tianjin now. Once again, I'm in my nice little cocoon, where I have "parents" who drive me around, take me out to places with great food, and are always at my every step. Just now, I said, "wo yao ke kou ke le" ( "I would like coca cola") and baba wanted to put his computer game on hold to go out and by me soda.

I don't know what to say to this kind of treatment. I'd like to write it off as a "cultural" thing, but I really should look more into it and try to understand my relationship with Lily's parents. What I mean is, do they want me to understand that they have accepted me and that, some day, I can repay the favor to them?

I know for sure that my relationship with them will not end after Lily leaves. I've already told myself that I will at least try to visit them once a week. This will be good, not only for learning how to use public tranportation in Tianjin, but also good for my practicing Chinese (the language and culture).I've discussed with Lily her parent's treatment on several occasions, especially when she begins to feel guilt herself. Her guilt lies in being one of the few Chinese who has the opportunity to study in another country, especially the U.S. Moreover, her parents have sacrificed many things for Lily's opportunity to come true. At the time, I did not realize it, being the spoiled American I am; having spent several days in China with Lily's parents, it is all starting to make sense.

See the similarities?

No, really, it goes deeper than that, I'm figuring out each day.

I'm beginning to understand more of Lily beyond this aspect. I forget sometimes that she's Chinese, that she's "just another American." Though this may be true to an extent - Lily does many "American" things - Lily is still Chinese at heart. She has a lot of her parent's compassion and good heartedness in her.

Back to Hong Kong and the rest of my experiences so far, I'm trying not to forget Anthropology and what it has taught me. I take for granted sometimes that I'm in another country, where people think and act differently from America. I feel that my sensitivity towards these differences is lacking at times, and I am reminding myself that I need to be more open-minded.

For example, Chinese people love to eat all sorts of food, things of which I'm not used to eating. One thing in particular is cow's stomach – what they translate as "beef viscous." You can find it in many Hong Kong butcheries, as well as pig intestine.

Here's a fishery shop on one street in Hong Kong:

I think not only do I need to improve upon my cultural sensitivity, but I also need to put forth effort towards my patience. I find myself impatient at times with people and situations, and I lose sight of the way things are. For example, I had zero tolerance towards the crowdedness in Hong Kong, as well as the way in which business is done; specifically, solicitation.

I continually bring this up as much as I have pollution in China. I just couldn't get over the persistence and evasion of private space by the guys waiting at the corner of the streets in Kowloon. These guys almost reach the point of harassment and they'll follow you so far as the next street over.

However, these guys are human beings who are struggling and trying to make it in this world. What I'm getting at is, my decision to go through with moving to and teaching in China was motivated by the reward of gratitude for what I have in America.

Like that saying, "you never know what you have until it's gone." Well, this is true, but you can reverse its implication; "you know what you have when it's gone from others." I think both hold true so far in my China experience. I miss my country and China has made me very proud to say that I'm "American" (something which, for some time, I have taken for granted).

Mike

Hong Kong: Asia's Crossroads

2007-08-23T07:02:00.000-07:00

If I were to tell you that Hong Kong is part of China, you would find it hard to believe me; well, it has only once again been part of China since 1997. I can’t really put my finger down on any one ethnicity or language to sum up what is Hong Kong.

Since being here, I’ve seen a wide range of people and languages. They say that the official languages are English and Cantonese, but that’s only half the truth; actually, it really should be only credited with Cantonese, less than ¾th the people actually speak English fluently.

Back to Hong Kong’s enigma: Hong Kong is located at the center of the Asian world. You have China to the north, Malaysia and Indonesia to the south, Southeast Asia to the west, and the great Pacific Ocean to the east. This is perfect for trade and industry, where supply and labor is found all around, and Hong Kong’s harbors are the gateway to the U.S. and the rest of the world. You can really see this in the demographics too, with people looking less Chinese and beginning to look more Malaysian and a hybrid of many ethnicities. This one's for you Charlie:

On the surface though, you will be crammed by people and bombarded with Hello Kitty and solicitors. Solicitation – people trying to sell you stuff on the streets – is rampant in Hong Kong. Today, taking our usual route, Lily and I counted up to 20 people trying to hand us pamphlets and sell us crap. I’m guessing I really do stand out like a sore thumb; I mean, they swarm me like flies in the middle of a large crowd of people.

Yeah, these guys:

Hello Kitty might as well run for prime minister, I’m sure she’d win by a landslide. You can find Hello Kitty and her cute little friends everywhere, from the subway, to McDonald’s, to business women scrambling about to their day jobs.

But it’s only half the story. Hong Kong is also the home place of Bruce Lee and Jackie Chan; man, those guys kick ass. Hong Kong breeds movie stars and has a New York style to it. Lily and I walked the Soho district, where one could find a hotel room for HK $2500 (more than US $300) a night. This area also has a lot of hills; it could brandish its own “Hollywood” sign. Maybe, “Leewood” (corny joke, I know).

Hong Kong also has a very beautiful bay area. The first night Lily and I spent in HK, we watched the laser light show that is supposedly world-renowned. From Kowloon (which is one side of the bay), you can watch fireworks set off in Victoria Harbor, as well as a plethora of lights from across the bay. These lights shape the skyscrapers on the other side (Central district) and are put in sync with music that is heard all around. Lily described it as seeing transformers in action; I describe it as a wacky anime scene. Just kidding, it’s real nice; though, you could take it as advertisement, because all the buildings in Central are labeled with huge companies (I’m talking Toshiba, Philips, Samsung, and the like).

If you want to get away from the hustle and bustle, you can hop onto a ferry and head over to Lantau Island. It is here that you see more of a village life, where small towns are surrounded by lush forest and hills. Today, Lily and I took this trip in search of the Buddha statue that is a “must see” in Hong Kong. After taking the ferry and setting foot on Lantau Island, Lily said that she felt she were in another place. I agree with her, it wasn’t quite the same as Kowloon.

From the pier, we took a bus that crisscrossed inland and along the coastline. Everywhere, you could see overgrown trees and bushes. This day, you were also submerged by fog; it really felt as if we were heading towards a sacred place. Not to mention the lakes and the harbor found everywhere around, I felt closer to nature once again.

We finally made it to the temple and the Buddha statue.

It’s interesting, as I told Lily, that there should be a statue erected for the Buddha. Likewise, there are many temples and mythologies that surround the Buddha. It seems that people are always interested in constructing their own beliefs surrounding a historical figure. I simply remember the Buddha wanting to be a humble person offering a philosophy to help people end their suffering. However, history and the Asian world have made him God.

Some other great places Lily and I saw in Hong Kong were the Peak, where you can see the entire city and harbor; Huang Da Xian temple, where Buddhism, Confucianism and Daoism are combined for worship; Lan Gui Fang, a bar district similar to Austin’s 6^th street.

Hong Kong overall has been very fun; expensive, but fun. Still, there is something within China that is beckoning me. So far in my travels, I’ve come to realize that it’s the people who make the memories and the life experience. Cities begin to look the same, but personalities are never duplicable. I’m ready to meet new and interesting people, as well as strengthen my relationship with Lily’s family. I can’t express enough gratitude for having met them, they are truly amazing people.

Beijing Happenings

2007-08-21T19:39:00.000-07:00

Wow, it has been a really long time since I last blogged, apologies. I have been busy as usual, living a new life, seeing new places, experiencing new things, I have so much to tell.

I should start by thanking you all for reading my blog and posting comments, I read them all and it makes me feel appreciated. Haha, Charlie, you always interest me, I'm not sure why you've always shown interest in my blogs (even the one I did for school), but the love is much appreciated.

Since my last blog, I've done pretty much the same in Tianjin. I've spent time with Lily's family, ate endless amounts of delicious food, and I've been slowly learning more Chinese. At this point, I'm able to hold about a 3 minute conversation with Lily's parents.

Lily and I also spent a couple of days in Beijing, where we stayed with "da yi" (eldest aunt) and "da baba" (eldest uncle). They were very hospitable and nice (what else would you expect from Chinese people?), and treated us out to dinner one night.

It is very typical for apartment complexes in China to have a green area with benches around. It is also common for bathrooms to have both the toilet and the showerhead in the same room. I'm sure you're wondering where all the water goes after one takes a shower: down the drain which is usually in the center of the room; I have to admit, this isn't found in every apartment, but it seems to be the rule.

About the dinner, it was very delicious. I tried true Peking (Beijing) roasted duck for the first time (I had roasted duck once already in Tianjin); it was really yummy. Typically, you place the duck meat inside a small thin flour wrap (much like a flour tortilla), along with a special sauce, onion slices, and slices of cucumber.

That said, Lily took me out to the historical area of Beijing, where you can see Tianamen Square, which is across from the Forbidden City and surrounded by "The Great Hall of The People" and a memorial hall for Mao Zedong.

It's always an interesting experience, walking on this Earth where so much history has occurred. Not only the millions who stood in front of Mao Zedong those days when he was above the gate, announcing the new republic and the beginning of a new day for China's people, but even the kings and queens who roamed the Forbidden City bring chills down one's back.

Interesting story about this, Lily told me that Mao never actually walked fully through the Forbidden City, only enough to the extent that he could give his speeches above the gate.

Rumor has it that Mao visited a fortune teller before he became chairman, and this fortune teller warned Mao that he could never enter the Forbidden City. This being that Mao wasn't of royal birth, that he was just a commoner who would one day be a leader. As a result, the kings would haunt Mao if he were to enter the Forbidden City. Too bad for Mao’s superstitions, he really missed out a very amazing palace:

The Forbidden City wasn’t quite what I expected, but areas of it still amazed me. Although I said that areas of historical importance bring chills, I think it is still hard to imagine how these places really were back in the day. My complaint about the Forbidden City is that it is occupied by too many people. This is a real difference from what the place used to be; an area reserved only to the king, his queens and his servants.

However, the garden near the north gate was very beautiful. Located in the center of the park is a very famous (what Lily referred to as) “wedding” tree.

We’ll see what the day brings me one day.

You can also find intricate architecture in the garden and throughout the palatial complex. I was especially impressed by the stone fencing surrounding the temple rooms located atop.

Beijing overall had a lot of historical places to offer, but I’ve already developed a love for the city of Tianjin. Agreeing with Nessa’s comment, Beijing has a lot to improve in the way of its pollution before the Olympics. I remember seeing it on television as well, and now I was able to see it in person. I just can’t imagine how it could be, but you really feel like you’re in a city at the center of a volcano, where smoke is surrounding you all over. It’s not so bad after a while, but it’s a long way from the good ol’ days.

Through Lily, I found out from the taxi cab driver that, back when he was young, the sky was really really blue. Man, that made ME “blue.” I’m thinking that environmentalists could create a “Beijing project” in which they would send a group of people to Beijing for about a week. During this week, they could show what the group’s city “could” be if they allow their environment to go to ruin.

Really though, I should give Beijing (and China for that matter) more credit. For China, this is the start of something amazing and exciting. China’s going through industrialization, and I’m merely a spit in the wind. I think had I been in America 100 years ago, it would be very much the same. I’m rooting for China, its people are wonderful and deserve better quality of life.

All That Matters is Family

2007-08-14T06:26:00.000-07:00

I've almost been in China for a week now, time really is flying by. I thought about it, and the first semester of teaching I'm sure will come to an end before I know it. This whole process is going to be very hard on my relationship with Lily, but at the same time, it will be a good test to our endurance. At the same time, learning Chinese and spending more time with Lily's parents will make our relationship very rewarding in the future; I can't wait for the day when I can have a nice conversation with Lily's parents.

I can't even imagine how things will be once Lily leaves, I've relied on her so much for everything; not to mention, she's my love. She, along with her parents, have done so much for me here in China. I have been lost in translation thus far, and it, along with being gone from Lily, will be a test to my patience. However, I have more motivation now to learn the language. I will get through the frustration and difficulty so that I can learn more about China from its people.

Lily's grandfather has so much to offer in the way of stories and Chinese history, I feel very humble in front of him. He was telling me today that he was once a teacher, and he told me about his family; he even offered me a picture of him. From what Lily has told me, he was very much a part of China's "Cultural Revolution." During this time, many teachers were arrested (among them Lily's grandfather), and much of China's society underwent turmoil; it was a generation in which many children did not even go to school. Here's "lao ye" (grandfather in Chinese):

James Gu, Lily's grandfathers' American name, reminds me in some ways of my grandpa; both are adorable, sweet, and love to eat! Who couldn't blame James though, his wife (Lily's grandmother) is an awesome cook! In fact, James was joking around the other day, saying that he's enjoyed "lao lao's" cooking for almost 60 years; wow, what a long time for one marriage.

Lao lao (grandmother in Chinese) has just as much fire in her as Liz. Both have a fun sense of humor, and both are very supportive of family. Lao lao has already taken me in as a grandson, stuffing me with delicious food each time I go over to her place.

She made us all dumplings the other day, which have no comparison to restaurant dumplings. Today, she made us several dishes for lunch; I really do feel like a little emperor in China!

I'd like to talk more about Chinese food, but that in itself is another blog all together (probably the next blog).

Not only have I enjoyed my time with Lily's grandparents, but I have become close with their neighbor, my "ge mener" (which means "bro" in Chinese). This guy really melts my heart, he's a hardworking vendor outside their apartment. Each time I pass by, he and I always shake hands and smile. More than once has he offered me free soda and water; mind you, he has to walk to the store and by everything he sells. Yesterday, I tried offering him 10 yuan for what he gave me, and he refused. I can't measure my appreciation for his unselfish heart, I hope he lives a great life.

Despite the language barrier, Brian's right in saying that body language goes a really long way. It's funny, Lily is always amazed when I can understand their conversation despite my not knowing Chinese. However, it is hard when Lily's dad is always smiling.

Nick Meng, Lily's dad, is one of the most unselfish people I've met in my life. Along with Lily's mom, he has accepted me as his second child. Like me, he enjoys a nice glass of beer, chilling out, and he is always thinking. He has also taken an interest in my well being, as well as my hobbies. Somehow, he already knows about my back problem, and has consistently offered me a variety of remedies; yesterday, he took us all out for a body massage.

He's also a great father.

Today, we drove all over town to acquire paperwork so that Lily can go with me to Hong Kong this Saturday. It's very frustrating, despite Hong Kong now being a part of China, Chinese people are still required to obtain paperwork so they can enter Hong Kong. In America, it's the equivalent of needing a visa to travel to Hawaii or Alaska.

The interesting aspect of this experience was that a travel agent actually drove with us to the police department where Lily could acquire her documents. This would be really bizarre in America, if a person at a travel agency were to go with you to a consulate office to help you process your paperwork; I mean, she actually got in the car and went with us to another side of town.

It was funny, the whole time Lily's mom offered this girl food and drink. Like her father, Lily's mom is a very sweet and unselfish person. She's a small cute lady who has the energy of 10 men. She likes to laugh and tease Lily and me all the time.

She, like Lily's dad, has also made an effort to speak English since I've been here; I can see in her myself attempting to speak another language. She's a lot like my mom in that she always feels the need to be doing something. Both women are hardworking and do whatever they can to help their children.
In any case, I think everything is being to work out. On Saturday, Lily and I will be leaving for Hong Kong, where we will be staying for about a week. Hopefully, I should be able to have my work visa processed and I'll be all set to teach in September.

Like I've said, time is really flying by, and I'm soon approaching the start of a new school year. It will be strange not being a student myself, but I think I'm ready for the next step. I hope that my life will continue to be filled with the wonderful people I've met. I can say that, although we all go through our ups and downs, we feel like nothing works out, in the end, when looking back, we can say "life really is beautiful." I can never say it enough, but I'm so grateful for all the people I've met, the experiences I've had, and the great moments that are all so precious to me.

See you next time in Beijing (tomorrow)!

Love,

Mike

China, First Impressions

2007-08-11T08:42:00.000-07:00

Hi everyone,

Apologies for the lack of updates to this blog, I have been in my third day already in China. So much to explain and tell, I will do my best to have my thoughts and commentary semi-organized.

It's interesting how rumors turn out to be both false and true, and you can never quite tell what is and what isn't until you have experienced it for yourself. I believe part of my decision to live in China was to demystify all the rumors I had heard and to see for myself what China is and what it is not.

Of course, I have to be careful in the commentary I make on this country, because I have only partially experienced China; Tianjin is but one of many cities in China, and it also undergoes continual change.

Putting aside my Anthropological tendencies, I have really enjoyed my stay thus far in China. Words can't express how wonderful and embracing Lily's family has been towards me. Not that I have forgotten my family back home, but I can say that I now have a family in China as well. From the very beginning, once I set foot outside customs in the airport, I was met with warm hospitality and smiles.

The first person I saw of Lily's family was her mom, who had been near the railing; she noticed me right away. I soon was able to finally see for my eyes Lily's dad, as well as Lily once again. It was great being able to hug and see Lily. She cried quite a bit, and it tore me up inside; that's when I knew what I had put myself through. Alma had told me several times, "There will be moments when you ask yourself, 'Why in the world did I choose this?'" I'll admit, I have pondered that quite often since being here.

It's not just the hurt I can foresee for both Lily and me, but it's also the displacement. Tianjin has brought to me mixed reactions. I am trying to keep an open mind to this whole experience, and I am making an effort in any way that I can to express my thoughts with sensitivity, but I have found a few things depressing so far. Among these things are the language barrier, the infrastructure of Tianjin and the pollution. If I could have asked for better preparation upon going to China, I would have wished for my friends to emphasize the pollution problem.

To the credit of my friends, I was given fair warning, but sometimes seeing it for yourself is the only way. I don't want to paint a dismal picture, but Tianjin has a long way to go to improve its environment. For example, in the few days that I have been here, I have only seen several moments of clear sky in which you can see blue. The rest of the time, it has been mostly grey here, with very little sunshine. You can actually see smog covering many buildings and visibility here is very narrow; you can't really see for many miles. It's almost as if the city has contiual fog over it, yet it's a result of pollution. Other complaints might be trash that can be seen on the streets and some of the atrocious odors you might experience from time to time as you walk along the streets.

Getting all of the negative criticism out of the way, China has been very beautiful. As Lily put it, people here may not have much, but their happiness sure goes a long way. I have yet to see any sadness amongst Lily's family and friends. Sure, I may have seen them on their good days, but I feel that people here have stronger connections with each other. China is such a large country, and many people have to rely on their social networking to get by; this is the practical side for Chinese people being strongly connected.

What I find is, day by day, I'm starting to see past the environmental problems, and beginning to really take to Lily's family and the other Chinese people I have met. I can't really emphasize how happy the moments have been here with Lily's parents and grandparents. For example, as I was standing in the open shower of Lily's grandparents' home, I thought to myself, "Wow, I'm really happy to be here." This was when I could hear Lily, her mother, her grandparents, and her cousins laughing and giggling; they all seemed to be so happy.

I would do the 10+ hour plane ride again just to be able to meet Lily's family. They all make me want to be more compassionate and unselfish. I've also told Lily that, part of this decision involved my wanting to better appreciate what I have. In other words, seeing what is China, and missing what is America has really made me come to love my country. I already miss the Austin environment, the music and the movies, as well as the food. However, I believe Americans could really learn a lot from Chinese warmth and compassion.

Well, these are my initial impressions and I will continue to add to and mold my understanding/view of China. I will also try to add pictures as soon as I can find a converter for my camera battery charger.

I miss you all and I will continue to update and keep in contact with you. By the way, thank you all so far the comments you have all left me. I have been able to read them, and I am really happy that you all have taken an interest in my experience. I hope to provide more interesting insight into China's lifestyle and my experiences here.

Love,
Mike

Goodbye Tokyo, Hello Beijing

2007-08-08T12:28:00.000-07:00

It's 4:28 am right now, I'm going to stay awake for this one; too anxious about seeing Lily, her family, and making it on time for my flight! In any case, it's good time to blog. Not to mention, there are still heaps of people here in the lobby area, so I don't feel so lonely. I'm actually a bit surprised, because some of the people here look to be under 13.

Japan is quickly coming to close, and I have to say, it has been quite an experience. Japan is a beautiful country, with beautiful people, delicious food, and many wonderful things to do. I have to say, the relationship has been love-hate. I had been anticipating China greatly, in effect, neglecting the time I had in Japan. Now, I'm a bit sad to see the place go. Marc insists that I will be back soon, and not to fret -- maybe?

It was a very nice final night in Japan. Marc and I attended a baseball game at Tokyo Dome, where we saw the Osaka Tigers pound the Tokyo Giants. In the 5 inning, the Tigers made 6 straight runs, and the place ignited! Here in Japan, seeing a baseball game is like witnessing European soccer or American football -- it's a big pasttime.

The game is very much like what you'd see in American baseball, except there's a larger fanbase. People constantly cheer and are more engrossed in the game, especially if they're team is winning, and they even sometimes like to sing along to Petshop Boys; interesting that they would play Petshop Boys at a baseball game.

Something of interest, Japanese baseball also has "beer girls." These gals will go up and down the aisles with a min-keg attached to their backs. Here's one: *Camera Snap* Konnichewa!

Although the game took place in Tokyo, and we had been in Tokyo our entire visit, our hearts belonged to Osaka this game. Still, my heart will always belong with Japan, a country that has treated me quite well. From the water-squirting toilets,

To the squatter,

To the adorable old people,

To the delicious food,

To the city skyline,

To the friends I made,

I'll miss you Tokyo.

However, today is a new day. It's several hours before I get on the plane to the center of Earth, China. I'm excited, but I am also nervous. I will be meeting Lily's parents for the first time, I can only hope that any expectations are met. I love Lily so much, I know I won't be able to hold back when I see her...

Well! I've got to stand up straight, brush off the shoulders, and head down the tunnel. It'll be a good experience, I believe.

Love,

Mike

Touching moments, lifelong memories

2007-08-06T22:01:00.000-07:00

Although my hostel has been a place where people come and go -- it seems like I have a new roommate each day! -- I have already forged memories that will last a lifetime. Of course, you all know about the Cali krew (what a cool group of guys), but I don't think I've mentioned a few others.

One noteable person was a guy from Argentina. His name is Carlos and he is both a Biology teacher and a kendo player. If you aren't familiar with the sport, kendo involves the use of sticks and body shots, where the neck area will gain you more points. Of course, the player with the most points wins. It's an interesting adaptation from the days of the samurai, though I never got too excited about the sport.

Back to Carlos, he in someway reminded me of the main character in the movie "L'Auberge Espanole." Then again, he offered something more. Mind you, his English was very limited, and I have to brag here, we spoke mostly in Spanish; though greatly limited, I was glad to see that I could still hold a conversation. Carlos told me about his sister and brother, the difference between Argentinian rice and Japanese rice, and an Argentinian tea called "matte." Not to make any effort to write out a romantic novel, Carlos spoke about the times in which he would enjoy matte with his "novia" (girlfriend) under cherry blossoms near a river in Argentina; I think near a city called "Corrientes."

I also met a very nice German guy who really put me in my tracks when it came to traveling. At age 26, he has already been to Australia, New Zealand, China, Brazil, Egypt, most of Europe, and now Japan. Wow. Tuzi, you and I have some catching up to do on traveling!

In between these people, I have met more Aussies than ever before in my life, Japanese people of all sizes and shapes and even Mexicans. Viva Mexico and Texas!

Among the Japanese, I will always remember the encounters I had at Sensoji temple. It really has become a sacred place to me -- I've already made offerings for Valdo, Lily, Marc, Alma and Tony, Brian and Eileen, Tim and Cindy, and more. Really, don't think I'm giving my entire money away, anything below 10 yen (such as 1 and 5 yen) is useles in Japan.

That's the inside of the temple. Here is where Marc and I meet up each day after he finishes working:

It is a place where you can see a lot of beauty, both in the children, and in the family interaction.

Of the many children, two of them made quite an impression on me. I'm not trying to be overdramatic or a sap about this, but it really moves me when I remember it. One of the girls was about half my height, had glasses and was very sweet to me. She, through her parent's encouragement, approached me as I waited for Marcus. She spoke several phrases of English, asking me "What is your name?" and "Where are you from?" Following her was her younger sister, a little girl of maybe 3. She asked some of the questions, with my responding in what little I could in Japanese.

I can say that already my decision to experience Japan and China has been very rewarding. I hope that I can offer these people something very special, just as you all have offered me back home. Thank you Brian and Eileen, Liz, Valdo, Tony and Alma, Cindy and Tim, Vinnie, Jason, Charlie, Doug, Josh, Kellie, Alicia and Steve, my baby Lily, Aaron, Steven and Anthony, Derek and Andrew, Sofi and Ray, and everyone else who has been so good to me in my life.

I love you all,

Maike

Caught up in Tokyo madness

2007-08-06T08:39:00.000-07:00

It has been a couple of days since I last updated the blog, apologies. It seems that Tokyo's boundaries are endless and without a limit on its districts. Alongside Marc, we have visited a number of districts in the last few days.

We revisited Shibuya a couple of days previously to taste Tokyo's nightlife. Marc knew of this one club called "The Womb," which is apparently a worldclass club. The place was huge; it had 4 floors and 3 DJs total for the night. On the night we went, they had been playing drum and bass on the mainstage. Here's their website for pictures of the inside area: http://www.womb.co.jp/

Lily asked a good question about the difference between American and Japanese clubs. Although it wouldn't be a fair comparison, Japanese clubs seem to fall in line more with the type of atmosphere I would like. Rather than an overflow of hip-hop, they are very good at offering a variety of music. The clubs are also more spacious and give special attention to the ambiance; Austin's cool, but some of the bars/clubs there seem rundown or altered warehouses in comparison.

However, the one drawback to clubbing in Japan is that it will cost you. Just for a night at The Womb, we had to drop 4000 yen, which is roughly $40. In America, paying that much would get you a world famous DJ. Then again, the atmosphere of a Japanese club doesn't really require anyone famous for DJing.

Another interesting side to clubbing in Japan is the restrictions of public transportation. Tokyo's subway system shuts down by midnight, so you are expected to stay at the club or in the district by next morning; the subways don't start running unil 5 AM next morning. It's not so bad, however, because the music and the dancing seem to make 4 hours become half an hour.

While Tokyo has its nightlife, there are chill areas. Marc took me to a really nice park in Ueno district, where you can see all ages strolling through treecovered walkways that surround a big pond of lilies; it's what you would expect from a postcard.

Here, Marc's enjoying a nice snowcone treat; that one didn't have milk in it, but Marc said that the snowcones normally do. Behind him is the pond full of water lilies, very beautiful. Here's more:

Located near this large pond area was a temple, just another temple. Really, it's an ongoing joke Brian and I had while in Europe. Much like the many impressive cathedrals one could find in Europe, temples are everywhere in Japan (and China from what I understand). Here's just one of the temples:

Very near this temple is a bench area on top of a hill, where you get a view of the bustling streets nearby Ueno Park. It is here where you can also see a statue of the "last samurai," Saigo Takamori:

Doesn't he just look adorable? One might almost think he were Arnold Schwartznegger's twin, good ol' Danny. Close to this is my close up with the background city:

Stepping back from the laidback nature of Ueno park, I take you right into Tokyo chaos once again. This time, the place is Harajuku, and the age group has shrunk to 18-25. Although one could probably find people of older age, Harajuku is more a hotspot for trendy teenagers looking to take part in the latest fashion.

Harajuku brought to reality the consumerism that is Japan and the type of lifestyles enjoyed by Tokyo cosmo-kids. Marc took me to a few shops, where one could find beaten up, ragged Ozzie Ozburn t-shirts for 12,500 yen; that's $125! We also found a UT-Austin t-shirt, which had a rip in the sleeve, for 6000 yen, ridiculous.

I think one conclusion of this is that America is very much popular in Japan (at least in Tokyo). Not just the clothing I've noticed, but the food that is "American" will also cost you a good amount. This seems to be in complete contrast with European thinking however (at least on the French side); I met two French girls here at the hostel who really love their country.

Not that I like to take political sides, but the overemphasis on how "bad" Bush is gets to be rather tiresome. And not just French, but German people as well. One guy with whom I roomed responded to my telling him where I live by calling it "Georgebushland." Well, narrowmindedness meets narrowmindedness I have to say.

Back to Japan's take on America, you would find the "American" food here absurd. A value meal, say a quarterpounder with fries, will cost you close to 7 yen ($7).

Yup, that's right, 700 yen. Though, it could be that the place was near Tokyo dome, which is where the Tokyo Giants play. In fact, getting a Japanese style burger, such as a "Moss" burger, isn't quite so pricy. I had one of those tonight, it was very delicious; I think it had some kind of sauce on it that included rice.

Isn't that so cute?! It's a glove for a hamburger bun. Just remember, if you're unsure, make it cute in Japan ;)

Speaking of gloves, we will be attempting to watch a Tokyo Giants game tomorrow night!

I will be going with the guys I met at the airport: Jose, Matt and Victor. I'll just refer to them for now on as the "Cali krew."

Mucho amor,

Mike

PS I miss my Lily girl <3

Impressions of Japan

2007-08-03T10:18:00.000-07:00

It's 2:16 AM and I finished up another day of being in Japan. Today was nice, I went to two new districts of Tokyo.

The first district I visited is a place called "Akihabara." In that district, they have a lot of small shops nestled in semi-high narrow buildings. Marc took me to a shop called "Super Potato," which is video gamer's paradise; they have almost every video game you could imagine.

Here's a game in the arcade, where everyone has a station. Each person uses a set of cards, which can be read by the placemat in front of them. I think these guys were playing an interactive soccer game; you'd like this one Brian!

Japan also seems to have a cult surrounding "cuteness." Marc speculates that it results from the rigors of adulthood, where many Japanese men and women are expected to where business attire and work very deligently; maybe it's an escape for them? In any case, here's a girl dressed up as a maid; she might be part of the many "maid cafes" that can be found in Tokyo. At these cafes, many women (I doubt men) will serve you coffee, or other beverages while dressed up in costume; I saw one girl dressed up as some kind of tiger, haha!

I also visited a few more places with some new friends I met the first day I arrived in Japan. These guys - Matt, Victor and Jose -- have been very fun. They're all spending a week in Japan, and come from southern California; I really wouldn't mind keeping in touch with these guys once we part ways. We're all going to go to a massage place tomorrow.

The second district we visited was Shibuya. What can be said about Shibuya... cosmopolitan, Asia's "Time Square," it's very interesting to see at night. All of the advertisings keep the sky lit. It is also here where the one of the world's busiest crosswalks can be seen:

This was an area just outside the train station, where everyone was puffing a smoke. I thought it interesting, especially the many captions they have posted on the cigarette canisters, attempting to prohibit people from smoking. Just look how "hard" Marc appears in this one:

I also spent more time at Sensoji temple. This place has sort of become my "reflection room" (Brian should understand this one, haha). There are steps which lead up to a temple, where I just like to look out and reflect on life. I had two university students come up to me and practice their English. One of the girls said she wanted to study abroad. I asked "where?" Believe it or not Liz, she said "New Zealand."

I also spoke to a very cute Japanese boy. He was wearing a bright yellow cap, with a mini tank top. He looked at me, and mumbled in a very cute way, "Konnichewa," which means "Hi." I then asked him, "Genki desu ka," which means "How are you?" So cute!

There were also a lot of other cute Japanese children. Here, they were using wooden spoons to pour water from a fountain onto their hands. I imagine it's much like our version of "holy water."

They also have an area where you can spread smoke across your body; "holy smoke"?

Here's the lobby of the hostel where I'm staying. I'm sitting here writing this blog write now:

I'm about to do what these girls were doing:

Well, I'm having a lot of fun so far, yet I can't wait to be in China. I already miss Lily so much, and it has only been 2 days! She said that here parents were so happy to see her that they take many pictures before she even had a chance to exit customs ;)

Wo xi huan ta de mama he baba = "I like her mama and papa."

Wo zhang ni, Meng Ying = "I miss you Meng Ying (Lily)."

Pictures of Japan

2007-08-02T18:04:00.000-07:00

Hey everyone, I have made it safely to Japan after 10 hours and 5000 miles of flying. It has been very exciting already, I was able to stay up fairly late last night despite the traveling and lack of sleep the night before.

Here are some pictures that I have taken already of Japan. This is all from Asakusa, which is a residential district in Tokyo:

I will post more pictures and give more description soon; I actually had a very nice blog written out and my laptop froze! Right now, I'm going to head out to another district of Tokyo with some guys that I met at the airport. It's a coincidence, they're staying at the same hostel!

Writing to you all very soon,

Maike

1:24 AM and down to the hour

2007-07-31T23:24:00.000-07:00

It seems that everything is all set at this point. I just got finished visiting with Kellie and Daniel, had a great conversation about past friends and upcoming plans.

Now, the only thing left to do is sleep and wait for Alicia to pick us up sometime before 6 AM. In case you all don't know her, she's Alma's sister; Alma was my boss at Ethnic Loft and is my Austin mom.

Despite the easy task of sleeping, I am suddenly panicking, wondering if I have packed everything I need for the next year. It's funny, I have been asked over the last couple of weeks if I am excited/nervous, but it all didn't quite hit me until now. Wow, I'm going to be leaving my country for longer than a short visit. I don't mean to be making a big deal out of this, but for a Texas homeboy, China is pretty out there.

I was able to realize a little bit of the cultural difference ironically through watching the new Simpsons movie; thanks Alicia and Steve for taking Lily and me!

The Simpsons have always been a funny reflection of American life, but for me, it was a wakeup call to some of the things that have been comforting for me; manners, behavior, cultural jokes, things that I shouldn't expect next year in China.

In any case, today was very nice. I experienced being car-less (I sold my car yesterday to Carmax), walking to and from campus, and I got to meet up with my best friend ("brother"), Valdo.

Valdo is someone special with whom I have become very close in the last couple of years. I am going to miss him so so so so much, he has been very impacting in my life. I think that he was sent my way as a guardian angel to look over and take care of me in Austin; in fact, he helped me numerous times last week, moving furniture all around Austin.

It doesn't really hit you how important and invaluable some people are in your life until they're gone, or away from you for a long time. In a way, this trip to China will help to re-ground me in my relationships with my friends and family. In fact, I sent out an email to my uncle Tommy tonight, hoping to reestablish a good relationship with him; we never fought our butted heads, I just didn't make a better effort to keep in touch with him.

Random facts:

I had precisely enough shampoo to last me today. The shampoo bottle had been sitting in my bathroom for over a year, and it just expired this month!

Lily and I are listening to Coldplay right now, good stuff.

Tokyo doesn't have street names? I'll have to check on this in a couple of days.

I love Lily, my friends and my family!

Here are some more pictures from the last month, enjoy!

Across the ocean, but with love,
Maike

Predeparture

2007-07-30T23:00:00.000-07:00

Thank you all so much for supporting my idea/decision to go to China. I have always strived to lead an interesting life, whether it be through my hobbies or the friends with whom I interact. I think that China will prove to be a very interesting and enjoying experience. However, this decision wouldn't have materialized without the love and support you all have given.

I would like to especially thank Brian and Eileen, Alma and Tony, Marcus, Lily's host family and my own family for the endless support in going through with this endeavor.

Some people truly believe that things happen for a purpose. Not to say that I always believe in this kind of thinking, but it is always nice entertaining myself with the idea that lousy moments in life do add up to something special.

I have been in the midst of moving and packing, along with all of the other exercises which go into closing another chapter of my life. However, all of this has come with some frustration.

I should mention a traffic citation, traffic in general and the time crunch under which everything has occurred.

But wow, time really has flown. I was only speaking about going to China, and I am only a couple of days away from leaving. And, despite the frustration, stress and tiresome, I am close to being ready. Everything is now following into place thankfully.

I secured a tourist visa which should allow me access to China. However, I will still need to obtain a work visa once I'm there. The interesting twist to this is that I will temporarily need to leave the country. I have considered Hong Kong at this point, for it doesn't require a visa and what I can I say, "Hong Kong" just sounds cool.

Apologies for the wordage on this post, I haven't done anything super interesting to tell yet. I can assure you, my blogs from here on out will be more picture driven; after all, pictures do say "1000 words," which will save me my hands.